[Note: the ellipses in this transcription sometimes represent ellipses in the diary itself, and sometimes represent missing text. We are working on this.]
[Signed on first page of diary:] Mary A. Snow, Caroline, N.Y.
[Clipping pasted in front of diary:] "Among the happy unions consummated during the present holiday season is that of our young friend, Geo. H. Sinton, son of Mr. Joseph Sinton, of West Hill, and Miss Mary A. Snow, an estimable young lady and daughter of Mr. James Snow, of Caroline Center. The marriage took place at the home of the bride, yesterday. We have known the groom from his boyhood up to the present time, and have found him quite unlike the average young man of the period. He early signed not only the temperance but anti-tobacco pledge, and for several years has been honorably connected with one of our temperance societies, as also the Grange of this place. Always regular in his habits, eschewing late hours, alike with beer and cigars, as detrimental to both morals and health, he is practically a stranger to dissipation in any of its multifarious forms. And, as to his capability, truth and probity, he is too well known in the business community here to render it necessary for us to speak. His open countenance and cheery smile inspire confidence everywhere, and he will succeed in whatever he undertakes. "Long life" and "joy" to you, George and Mary! "
[Transcription begins:] Caroline, March 12, 1878
I have been away part of the winter. The first of January I went to Mr. Sinton's at Ithaca and returned last Friday. I have passed an happy winter with them: they are a very fine family. Our tastes are alike in a great many things. Every morning I attended lectures at the University; these I enjoyed immensely. I heard lectures in Botany at the Sage College, every Monday, Wednesday, & Friday at ten, by Prof. Prentiss. These were in Structural or Systematic Botany-advanced from the "first lessons." He took up a number of the different Orders, twenty perhaps, gave us the species in each and compared the characteristics of the orders nearly related to each other. Some of his descriptions of plants were very fine--as in the magnolia, the Tulip tree-and many others. In one of the last lectures to which I listened, he described to us the manner in which the Brazil nut grows also the Sopucaci [?] nut--they are the seeds of a very large nut--so are the Brazil nut. These Sopucacia [?] nuts also grow in Brazil, the tree is about an hundred feet high--they are sometimes called Monkey Nut because the seeds drop out and the monkeys gather and eat them. He showed us the large thick shell of the nut after the seeds had fallen out. These seeds are about the size of the Brazil nut and the flavor is even more delicious. They are occasionally seen in the London markets, but very seldom in our country.
At eleven o-clock daily I attended Prof Russel's lectures on Roman history. I did not hear his lecture during the first part of the term. The descriptions of the characters of some of the prominent men were very interesting. Prof Russel is very fine in description. He speaks slowly, distinctly and with perfect ease.
At twelve o'clock on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays I heard Prof Anthony in Physics. The greater part of the term was given to the subject of sound. The explanation of the production of the musical tone in the organ pipe was given. The major and minor scales were explained: The longituding vibrations of [?Rods] and [? cords etc.]. In one of the last lectures to which I listened Prof Anthony showed us the construction of the Telaphone [sic]. When he announced that the students cheered with spirit. His room is very large and was always full, although he gave the same lecture twice because there were so great a number to be accommodated in the room. There were usually a number in from town to listen, and see his experiments. Prof Anthony is a very easy lecturer, never puzzled to express himself and is not annoyed by what the students do in the class room. I do not remember of his reproving them but once; that was when there was a little whistling; he said that no gentleman would whistle in the classroom. I usually sat by a Miss Woolworth in Prof Anthony's, she had his "Note Book" and I looked over in it with her. She is a grandniece of Mr. Woolworth one of the prominent educational men in this state. At first I did not have a favorable impression of her I thought she looked a little cross, but I afterward found her quite pleasant.
I attended a few lectures in Rhetoric, some of the different tropes were introduced: The Similie, Metaphor, Apostrophe etc. Miss Rhodes, and Miss Hoxie were in this class. Prof Shackford has the Rhetoric classes. --These lectures that I attended, were in the Freshman year. I heard one or two lectures in Chemistry but did not like them very well: to be interesting one should have the laboratory practice with them.
The first lecture that I attended at the U. was in Agricultural Chemistry in the Chemical Laboratory: it was by Prof Caldwell, it was on Drainage, Irrigation, Tillage Paring & Burning. I went with Miss Hoxie we were the only ladies in the room: there were a great many gentlemen. One day I went with Miss Otis into the German class. They were reading little stories about the "kinder," what nice little games they had in the barn.
Last but not least I heard Prof Corson's Lectures on Literature. He took Robert Browning, Mrs. Browning and Tennyson--also Coleridge. The lectures upon Tennyson and his works I enjoyed more than any of the others: though they were all beautiful. He usually read some at his lectures; he is a fine reader, it was delightful to listen to him. I think I never shall forget my listening to these lectures of Prof. Corson's, I enjoyed them so intensely. I have notes from them all, in my notebook. They were published weekly in The Cornell Era.
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A few persons from town came in to hear the lectures--Mrs. Benchley as frequently as anyone-she brought her knitting work like a country woman.
It is delightful to listen to some of these beautiful lectures and to feel that all around you are enjoying them equally as much as you are.
--I spoke of Prof Corson as last--I heard Prof Boyesen three or four times. He lectured upon German Literature. He is very enthusiastic in his lectures and tells a great many funny stories from German authors. He has large ideality--a vivid imagination. His lectures are delightful--he has a little different way of pronouncing his words from we Americans, but he can readily be understood. Some of the young ladies criticised him pretty severely sometimes--but it was nothing more than girls' talk. --more anon.
At Home, June 18th, 1878
Since I have written in this many things have happened which I ought to have made note of--but I have been busy, housecleaning, sewing and have had to write some letters, of course. George and Melvin Sinton came out here three or four weeks ago, they stayed all night with us. Geo. brought me "Birds and Flowers" by Mary Howitt: it is a beautiful book of poems, and I prize it highly. Margaretta is doubtless home by this time, for she wrote me a few weeks ago, that her school was to close by June 5th. It seems rather strange to think that Margaretta is out of school, she has been going for so many years. She is highly cultured.
Sunday, June 16th.
It is very rainy today, so none of us go to church except Pa: it seems pleasant to have a stormy Sunday occasionally, so that one can do just what they please.
I have been looking at Middlemarch, there are some things in it that I wish to copy in here. Mother, sister and I read it together this Spring. We all enjoyed it so much; there are so many different characters portrayed, and so much dealing with motive, that one almost shudders at times in reading it. The book is full of life lessons, of sermons upon life. Dorothea the heroine is an admirable character, she was not perfect, but she tried to do that which was fight. She had a very strong and ardent nature, and wished to devote her life to the furtherance of some great good. When about twenty, she married Mr. Casaubou [check name] a clergyman, and a man versed with ancient lore. She thought him to have a great soul, and engaged upon some great work, so she married him, because she wanted to help him. He was engaged upon the Key to Ancient Mythologies for many years and finally died before it was completed. He was not loving and kind, although he did not mean to be unkind, and it was a great trial to Dorothea. She, after the death of Mr. Casaubou, married Mr. Ladislaw a young man who did not care so much for ancient lore, but look an active interest in things that were transpiring around him. In a conversation with Will Ladislaw she said this one day. -"I have a belief of my own, and it comforts me: 'What is that?' said Will. 'That by desiring what is perfectly good, even if we don't quite know what it is and cannot do what we would, we are a part of the divine power against evil--widening the skirts of light and making the struggle with darkness narrower."'
Of another time in talking to Mrs. Sydgate, she said-- "Trouble is so hard to bear is it not? How can we live and think that any one has trouble--piercing trouble--and we could help them
and never try? What should I do--how should I act now, this very day, if I could clutch my own pain, and and compel it to sit in silence, and think of those three? ------- She said to her own irremediable grief that it should make her more helpful, instead of driving her back from effort. Dorothea herself had no dreams of being praised above other women, feeling that there was always something better which she might have done, if she had only been better and known better.
The contrast between Dorothea Brooke and Rosamond Vincy (Mrs. Sydgate) is so great. Rosamond was vain and thought only of herself, she caused her husband a great deal of grief Dorothea thought only of others, although she had some intense suffering, it made her better and gave her even greater sympathy for others.
July 1st Monday afternoon.
It is a beautiful day and it does not seem that any one could be unhappy when nature is so lovely: but unkindness will make everything seem sad. It grieves me so, to think Fred cares so little about the happiness of others. I do not know why he need be so, perhaps he will grow out of it as he grows older. Sorrow is a great purifier, perhaps it will take suffering to bring forth his better nature. I wish I were a boy, I would be kind and loving to my mother and sisters. But I know I am not as patient as I ought to be. I think too much about myself rather than the one who grieves one.
We have lately had the story of Daniel in our Sabbath school lessons, how gentle and kind he was to those who persecuted him. After he had spent the night in the den of lions, according to the king's decree, he said "0 King live forever"- meaning to relieve his anxiety. I pray to be patient and good every day, I do not know why I am not more so. I do not think [page appears to be cut out]
August 12th 1878
... In the morning Mr. Sinton showed us the bees. He has the movable combs. He showed us the cells of the [?????], called our attention to the difference between the [???] and working bees. They are larger and have larger cells they cannot sting. The Queen bee has still a larger cell, and
is made in some imperfection of the comb where there is more room or room for a larger cell. The body of the queen bee is longer than that of the working bee, but no longer around. The queen bee lays its eggs in the different cells. They produce a worm which is at first very tiny, but grows into a larger worm, quite filling the cells. It then goes into the pupa state, then the bee is produced or comes from that. The bees at first are quite weak, and the older bees feed them. Bees are not cross, and are never so happy, as when they are working. It is very curious, but all bees are undeveloped females (except the drones) and by being fed the royal jelly would become queen bees. -more anon.
Caroline Center Sept 25th, 1878. Monday evening:
We have been reading David Copperfield by Dickens and I have made the acquaintance of some very pleasant characters. Agnes Wickfield is such a good girl -- a perfect pattern: She is thoughtful and patient, and did so much for those around her. There is one thing which I wish to quote; it is what Mrs. Strong says in regard to marriage; -- it is of her cousin Jack Maldou of whom she is speaking, when she says: If circumstances had not happened otherwise, I might come to persuade myself that I really loved, him, and might have married him, and been most wretched. There can be no disparity in marriage like unsuitability of mind and purpose. There is nothing, said Annie (Mrs. Strong), that we have in common. I have long found that there is nothing. If I were thankful to my husband for no more, instead of so much, I should be thankful to him for having saved me from the first mistaken impulse of my undisciplined heart. Oh, take me to your heart, my husband, for my love was founded on a rock and it endures always.
This impressed me so much, for I have felt of late that I am so undisciplined and so incapable of judging. When I look at the years before me, I do sincerely pray that if I marry, it may be to one who has sympathy for all that is good and true. I should be unhappy with one who does not.
I wrote to Mr. Rounsevell and told that I would rather not receive regular visits from any one of present. He replied by letter -- told me that he loved me as he had not loved any one before -- and much else. I shall write to him when I can get time. [?] was here last evening (Sunday) he asked me if he could come again and I told him he might -- but goodnight.
Saturday August 16, '79
Margaretta wants me to come and stay a few days with her before she goes back to her teaching (in Florence Mall). Geo wanted me to come and go with them to Cazenovia with the excursion he said he would come for me. I do not know whether to go or not. I told them I would write about it --I would have to talk with Ma about it first, she was so busy then with the company that I did not want to call her away. Mother says I can do just as I like about it -- I have talked with her since.
October 6th ’79
It is a pleasant October day, the leaves are falling, they look so pretty covering the ground in the orchard. Fall is pleasant, but one dreads to think of the long cold winter following though each season has its beauties if we have an eye to see and appreciate loveliness of earth. 0 how good God, the father is to make such a beautiful world for us to live in. My soul is filled with gratitude to him. I have been reading two good books lately. "John Halifax, Gentleman" and "The Knight of the Nineteenth Century" -- both so good -- the latter shows what becoming a Christian can do for one, how it can transform a selfish, conceited overbearing character into one that is lovely, unselfish and pure. It is also shown how much good an earnest Christian can do. Mrs. Arnot [?] in the book is my ideal of what a Christian woman should be.
Home, July 10th, 1880 Saturday afternoon.
It has been very warm all day, the thermometer nearly up to ninety in the shade. Yesterday too was very oppressive. Jessie has been over to Mr. Thomas' all the week, I expect her home tonight, I am always glad to have Saturday night come so that I can see her. The cherries were very early this year we picked them this week. We have dried most of the cherries-, we have twenty one cans of fruit. I picked seven of strawberries, the first I have picked in several years.
Two weeks ago tonight George Sinton came here (he comes up here every month) Sunday we went out into the woods, we took "Birds and flowers" the book Geo. gave to me two years ago, and read aloud to each other. We do enjoy each other's company so much, and we have pleasant times when he comes up here. I was at Ithaca the last of May, I went home with Geo. Sunday night. Monday we attended the exercises in the cemetery -- it was Decoration day. There was some beautiful singing. I always have such pleasant visits at Mr. Sinton's. Mrs. Sinton "the little mother" is so good. I expect she will be my mother some day. - - - Tuesday morning before I came home I went with George on his route. Mrs. Sinton wants me to call on a Mrs. Curtis over on East hill - she wanted me to see her baby. George had told Mrs. Curtis that perhaps he would bring her home with him. George and Mrs. Curtis went into the kitchen before we went away and Geo. wanted me to come out there and see Mrs. Curtis' pretty dishes. Then as Geo. was about to go Mrs. Curtis handed him a package which she said he might give to Miss Snow after he got home. The package on the outside was directed "to her." When we got home we opened the package and found a lace tie with beautiful latting (?) ends, and a note which said "Please accept this snow-white tie from thy friend Mrs. Curtis." I thought it was so nice of her in Geo.'s account. She thinks a great deal of him, she sees how good he is. Mrs. Curtis has teased Geo. about Miss Caroline Center [i.e. Mary Snow], I think she was speaking to Mrs. Sinton about it one day and Mrs. S. said she would not be surprised if they got Miss Caroline Center down there some day. Mrs. C. was quite surprised and said "Is she good enough for George?" Mrs. S. replied yes, she is just as good as George. Mrs. S. doubtless thinks so, but I do feel that Geo. is better than 1. He is so perfectly kind and so sweet in disposition. I know because I spent two months there and was with George every day. I do feel thankful for one so good as Geo. It does seem good to have found the fight one, it is as Mrs. Sinton told me "such a feeling of rest." I do appreciate being settled, I was so worried and was so anxious in seeing to what step to take, there were some who wanted to me to take another step. But I waited until I saw clearly. I tried to do what was perfectly right.
At my home in Caroline Feb 6, 1881
So much has happened since writing in this. George and I were married Dec. 30 - Thursday, 1880. We have been married almost six weeks.
Of my wedding there were of Geo's friends, the misses Bartlett from Erie(?) Co. - the Candees from Ithaca and father and mother Sinton. Then there were all of our ants and uncles and cousins around here. Robert & Sabra Clonk (?), Susie and Willie Evans. There were thirty-seven in all. It was a very cold day - the only unpleasant thing. Our wedding we thought passed off very smoothly. Rev. R. Sabin performed the ceremony. We had five kinds of cake - Orange, Coconut, Fruit, gold and silver cake. Pear & Cucumber pickles -. For meat we had scalloped oysters, pressed chicken and beef Biscuit & butter - tea and coffee. For fruit Oranges and Grapes. The fruit was a great ornamentation to the table. We arranged a centerpiece of oranges and grapes on a large platter and other smaller fruit dishes were on the ends of the table. The guests went home early, as the days are so short. The hour set for us to be married was at one o'clock p.m. We were not married until half past one or near that time as the minister and a few of the guests came late. I was married in a brown silk trimmed with brown satin. - George in a black broad cloth suit. We looked very nice. We stayed at home that night and Geo and I washed up the dishes. The next day we went to Ithaca. New Year's day there was a company there - my brothers and sisters - The Candees, Mr. & Mrs. Crandall and Mrs. Clapp. - the cousins from Erie Co. We had a very social time. They had for dinner a very large turkey, weighed 18 lbs. - chicken & beef, vegetables, three kinds of cake, rice pudding - grapes etc. Mr. Candee carved the turkey. We had a very pleasant time that week while the cousins were there, Jessie stayed too. I came home a week ago last night to do some work. I have made 10 towels, 7 dish towels 3 pairs sheets - with mother's help, and we have tied 4 comfortables. two for Jessie and two for me just alike.
George came up last night to see me and stayed until four o'clock this afternoon. We had such a good visit, and I have missed him so much this week. We want to grow more and more together, and grow in love for each other as the time passes away. God grant it! We believe in living pure married lives, and helping each other to grow into that which the highest and best - putting down the lower. O, I hope that grace will be given me, strength from above, that I may be a blessing and a help to my husband. --he is so dear to me, and I wish for his sake that I was a thousand times better than I am.
Ithaca N.Y. March 20th, 1881
Sunday morning. - George has gone with the milk this morning so he could not go to church. I did not go as he could not go, father and mother have gone. We have entirely given up going west this Spring - Geo and I. I do not doubt but what we shall all be there in a year or two. O I do so want a house of my own. Mother Sinton is real good and kind, but our ways in a good many respects are quite different. She is so saving of fuel that I am cold almost all the time, unless the day happens to be uncommonly warm. I think if one wants to keep the family well that one of the first things it to keep warm. Sometimes I can hardly keep from crying, but I want to be patient and good - George is so good and kind and considerate. He is a great deal better than ordinary men. We do not live in a way to have children carelessly, we both feel that it is wrong to live so, and sometime we want some nice good children. O I do want to be patient and have that "Charity that beareth all things." Living as we do now I feel that one needs a great deal of Christ in the heart to help them to live sweetly. I want to be like Alice Cary's mother
She held her house beneath her hand
As steady and serene,
As though it were a palace
And as though she were a queen.
We were home last Sunday. It seemed so good to see them all again. Mr. Candee's people took their things from here this week. There George has come and I will stop writing.
"West Hill," April 21, 1881 [?].
These are lovely days, and we are busy as we can be. Afternoons we go on the hill and cut spinach, it is so sunny up there and the view of the lake and hills surrounding are so beautiful. I do enjoy the outdoor air so much, mornings we are busy in the house. George and I get a little time to read, we are reading "Walden Pond" by Thoreau and it is very interesting the latter part particularly, at first I thought I was not going to like it. --Margaretta was married April 10th on Sunday at her little home in Colorado Springs. Mr. Frank Otis was the fortunate young man. Robert and Jessie [Mary Snow's sister] were here that Sunday - we had a good visit with them. Jessie and I slept together, and did a good deal of talking before getting up.
Jessie bought (or gave me the money to buy) silk for her a dress, she had selected it. - She will be married sometime in June. I am so glad for her sake, I know that she thinks so much of Robert. I hope Jessie will have some children, she will make such a splendid mother, she understands children so well. ----George is so good - it is sweet peace with him - we have our little trials - but we love each other dearly. - I want always to be a help and a strength to him .....
In "our room", June 18, 1881-
I have been on the hill picking strawberries this afternoon and feel pretty tired. George has gone to town with the berries. -- Jessie was married June 7 to Robert.
I had a good letter from Margaretta today she sent congratulations to Jessie, she is seeing a good deal of the scenery of Colorado now.
Ithaca N.Y. July 25 1881
In "our room"-
My darling has gone to Colorado. - He and mother started this morning - I miss his dear presence so much - O how shall I live with out him -- my precious one. We were up early this morning to [???] them to the station at six o'clock. I laid down just before dinner and slept a little while. In my dream I thought my cheek was right by his, and I rested so sweetly. - O it is beautiful to love each other so. Last night he held me in his arms, close to his heart - we cried together, and we prayed together. I shall take my testament to bed with me every night that he gave to me, and I will pray to God that he will watch over and keep my precious one. - and I will kiss him good night as I always have. - While he is away - or while mother is gone, I want to do faithfully every duty. I am going to keep the accounts and attend to every thing about house. If Geo's health improves he will stay, and I shall go to him in the fall or early winter and we will have a sweet little home of our own - O won't it be nice? God bless our home, and keep me to make it happy for my loved one.
Sunday, Sept 4.
.... I hear from George often, he writes me such good letters. He likes it there and I expect to go in October, George has bought me a side saddle and I mean to try to learn to ride horseback when I get there.
My last mornings at home, Aunt Lottie and Susie have just been in here a few minutes. I have been up home during the past two weeks, and such a pleasant time as I have had.... To day is a beautiful bright day, I expect to start in a little while for I. [Ithaca] and may go to Buffalo tomorrow. I shall write and hear from the dear ones at home often. Pa went out in the woods this morning and got me two dozen little maple trees, for me to take with me.
Colorado Springs, Colo. Nov 18, 1881
Here I am away "out west", I am sitting now right in sight of the mountains. I started from Ithaca Oct 15 and arrived here Sunday morning Oct 23, so that it was just three weeks ago today. George was at the depot to meet me when I got there, and I was so glad to see him, and we had been separated so long almost three months. He was not quite thro' delivering the milk, and I went with him to the rest of the places. The town looked so pretty that lovely October morning, with the pretty yellow leaves on the cottonwood trees, and how different from the East.
My Journey - what a grand thing it was to me, I enjoyed every bit of it, then I made such
pleasant acquaintances on the cars. I wrote a letter home to Pa and Ma describing it to them. I had a splendid time in Buffalo, they are a very pleasant family - the Bartlett family. Mary and I had a beautiful ride Sunday afternoon, we went down "on the front" by Lake Erie, saw old Fort Porter an old fort built in the time of the Revolution. U.S. soldiers were quartered near there. Then we went to the Cemetery where her brother who has recently died is buried. There is a beautiful lake about in the center of the Cemetery, and there were white swans on it. In the morning we went to hear the Rev. Mr. Cutter, his text was "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of Wisdom" he preached a beautiful sermon. Monday morning before I started, Jane her father & I went to the City hall, a beautiful stone building, the finest one in Buffalo, we went to the room where Alice does her writing or copying and then to the Council Chamber a room gorgeously finished off. It is where the city laws are made. The stand or throne as Jane called it (for that seems more appropriate than anything else) is all of black walnut, it has four pillars. The chandaliers [sic] were immense and I felt as though I was in a Royal place. The city hall cost a million dollars I think. Jane went to the depot with me and I started about 1 P.M Monday, I went by the way of the Canada Southern. (paid $35.50 for a through to G. S. and B. second class) I crossed Niagara River soon after leaving the city. I did not like Canada very well, there were so many fields full of stumps. I saw ravages of the fire, the tall trunks of the trees standing, the foliage and limbs all burned. The maple trees looked pretty, bright yellow and red. As we approached St. Thomas the clouds thickened up and we had a thunderstorm, and it was night. At Detroit we were ferried across Detroit river, the cars came right on the boat. There were fourteen full cars on our train - they attached an excursion train; estimated about 2000 people, the excursionists were going to the Chicago exposition. While we were being ferried across I opened my car window and talked with some girls, who also had their heads out of the windows in their car, a palace car.
I went to sleep about eleven o'clock and slept considerable the rest of the night. In Michigan there were woods - woods on either side, and considerable water standing on the land. At Michigan City we saw a great deal of lumber by the canal - and Lake Michigan with its great green waves. There was a long stretch of clean white sand banks near the lake, they looked so pretty. We reached Chicago about twelve o'clock Tuesday. I went across the street to a 25 eating [?] house, another gentleman and lady from the same train went too. We three sat down at a little table together, I found out during the meal that their names were Mr. and Mrs. F. A. Clemens, from Daneville [?] N.Y., they were going to Iowa on a visit. From Chicago we were together until we reached Desmoine, where they got off. What a delightful time we had through beautiful Illinois the sun shone out so brightly, and it was the first time I was ever on the prairie, O I did enjoy it so intensely, I had such pleasant company and it seemed as though I should never tire of looking. At night I saw the sunset, I realized then I was going west, for it seemed as tho' I was going right to it. The clouds by the horizon were brilliantly red, it looked so different from what it does in a hilly country. Some of Ill. was level & smooth as a house floor, and the cars ran so smoothly. There were ledges of rock by the streams, what a productive soil it was so rich and black, and the country so well improved. I saw many dairies and cheese factories and nice farm houses. Iowa was much more rolling, I could look away off and see the little houses dotting the rolling prairie, and the great corn fields around them. I remember looking away as far as my eye could reach and just at the horizon I saw a little village with its white church spire, it looked so pretty. The houses thro' Iowa were small, but most of them painted, quite frequently there would be a very nice house. Wednesday about noon I reached Council Bluffs, while at the Transfer waiting to see if Will would not come I went up to the Emigrant house where the Em. - are fed, what a sight it was, there was a Chinaman in his native costume, there were Germans and Swedes and nationalities that I did not know. Some of the women were knitting, some eating, and some minding their babies.
Will did not come, so I took a streetcar and went up town within a few doors of his office, I found it with out any trouble. I had a very pleasant visit there I like Nina well. We sung some in the evening. Thurs. morning Will and Nina and I went up on the Bluffs where we could see up the Missouri river valley, there was Council B. below us and across the river, Omaha. It was a beautiful view, the curving river, and high bluffs on either side. C.B. has a population of about 20,000 Omaha 30,000. After we went down from the Bluffs I went to the depot and took the train. The Missouri River was quite low when I crossed it.
Through Eastern Nebraska it was [?] there were very large corn fields and heavy green prairie grass in its wild state. Along the Elkhorn river was Elms beautiful Elms, box elder and Cottonwood trees. The soil was rich and black. The hay stacks were low and long and narrow, flat on the top. The houses small and low, but most of them painted. There were large nice looking herds of cattle. At night, for the first time I saw a prairie fire.
What a beautiful country it was thro' the Platte river valley, we saw near the river, a beautiful stream for a long way, there were no fences, but droves of cattle & droves of horses. There were many large windmills. We crossed the Platte River a little below Columbus. Then night settled down upon us and I saw no more until Friday morning - near Lodge Pole, there I saw a large covered wagon "Prairie Schooner" with horses before it, and by its side a fire, and some men cooking their breakfast. Dugouts & Mud houses are the style of building here, nothing but cattle on the plains. We passed thro' Prairie Dog town where there were lots of little hills made by the prairie dogs, and the little animals sitting by them. There were many cattle paths across the plains. The country seemed desolate and barren thro' there, and the people looked rough. At our place there was a log house with its green blinds and curtains that looked real cozy.
We reached Cheyenne some where about noon I think, a lady told me it was a rough city, tho' there were many nice buildings there. From Cheyenne to Denver there were ranchmen and cowboys sat just ahead of us. They passed their bottle round, bought apples and ate them, sang their ranch songs with their feet in the car window. How amusing and interesting it was to me, a new phase of life entirely. Then they had a real lot of "Wild Bill" Literature which they passed around freely.
I went through Greeley which I liked so well, it looks like a thrifty farming town, there are Cottonwood trees in and around it, the houses are nice. There was good corn there. I got to Denver about seven o'clock Saturday evening, went into the finest depot I was ever in. I took a carriage and went to Mr. Otis. The next day I saw something of the city. I liked it so well, the buildings are all new, and there are so many pretty little brick houses, like the one M & F live in. There was a great deal of show in Denver, a great deal of wealth. Had a very nice visit with F & Margaretta. They gave me some nice music in the evenings.
Sunday morning - I took the train for Colorado Springs, I could not wait any longer to see George. And what a lovely ride I had that morning. When I started from M's it was misty, but soon the sun came out, and what a beautiful view I had of the mountains, they were continually changing. On the top of one of the Mts. I saw rock that looked just like a castle, as I have seen pictures of them, it stood boldly out at the edge of the mountains. There were many cloth tents out along the road. On the Divide there was a beautiful lake Palmers; the water so clear. I had a
very pleasant chat with a lady who had lived in the mountains some and she described Mt. scenery so beautifully. She said Denver is destined to be a Chicago, Colorado Springs a Saratoga. By and by I came to the depot and there was George -- the best of anything I had seen. We went to Aunt Mary's and stopped a minute, Clara came out and kissed me, Aunt M wanted we should come in to dinner, but we preferred to go to our own little home. Melvin had a nice dinner for us and the table neatly set. We sat down and ate and were a happy family. How I do enjoy this little home, and being mistress of it. It is just as cozy as can be, the mow [?] carpet down, our pictures, bureau and books. --George too enjoys it just as much as I, he thinks it is "just lovely." At another time I will tell about the pleasant acquaintances I met on the cars.
Tuesday Dec 14th 1881 -
Ex. from Chapter entitled --
"A Happy Married Life" -- Dr. Cowan
To look for perfection in a husband or wife is simply an absurdity. We all have our faults, failings, and backslidings. It is astonishing how, with the vast majority of mankind, and especially womankind, little trifles, little troubles will cut so much deeper and last longer than any great wrong. When anything has occurred that appears in the remotest way to disturb the harmony of married life, immediately should the party who has done the wrong make open and full confession; confess and promise to try not to repeat the deed done. Our Saviour has said "Offences will come" and at the same time He gave the remedy, good for all time: "Go tell it between thee and him alone."
The banes of domestic life are littleness, falsity, vulgarity, harshness, scolding, vociferation, an incessant issuing of superfluous prohibitions or orders, which are regarded as impertinent interferences with general liberty and repose, and are provocative of rankling or exploded resentments.
The blessed antidotes that sweeten and enrich domestic life are refinement, high aims, great interests, soft voices, quiet and gentle manners, magnanimous tempers, forbearance from all unnecessary commands or dictation, and generous allowance of mutual freedom. Love makes obedience lighter than Liberty. Man wears a noble allegiance not as a collar but as a garland. The Graces are never so lovely as when seen waiting on the Virtues, and, where they thus dwell together, they make a heavenly home.
Promise each other sacredly never - not even in jest - to wrangle with each other, never to bandy words or indulge in the least ill humor. Wrangling in jest, putting on an air of ill - humor becomes earnest by practice. Mark that! Next promise each other sincerely & solemnly, never to keep a secret from each other, under whatever pretext and what ever excuse it might be. You must continually and at every moment see clearly into each other's bosom. Even when one of you has committed a fault, wait not a moment, but confess it.
As you keep nothing from each other, so, on the contrary, preserve the privacies of your house, marriage state, and heart from father, mother, brother, sister, aunt and all the world. You two with God's help, build up your own quiet world.
Your souls will grow, as it were, to each other, and at last will become as one.
Let the married exercise common sense, sympathy, sensibility and benevolence toward each other, let them wear the garb of modesty and delicacy, cheerfulness and contentment; let them grow into a love of domestic life; let them have children and love them; let them ever exercise the spirit of self denial, never omitting mutual concession and forbearance; let them ever observe order, system, neatness, and industry, economy and frugality; let them ever exercise the true and pure that is in them; and nightly let their united souls join in prayer to the Father of us all, let them grow into the best part of their natures, and grow out of the bad that is in them, and with hearts heads and destinies united, they will grow up into the Mount of Transfiguration
[two pages cut from the book, it continues ... ] herd of nineteen cattle - so that will make business enough for three. - - We are in a query as to where it is best to settle - where whether here or on a ranch, or a little way out on the plain.
We are having lovely weather now, tho' very hot in the middle of the day, the summer has been an uncommonly wet one for Colorado. I have been taking a few lessons in flower painting - oil colors, fine in all, I have enjoyed it very much.
On Friday of the past week, George and I went up into Crystal Park, we put our lunch in a tin pail, Geo. wrapping his rubber coat around it, and tying it on the saddle, we got started about ten o'clock. In some places going up the side of the mountain the road was very steep. The scenery along the road was grand, after we had gotten up at quite a height, we could look away down in the valleys below us, the park is a pleasant place a few families were tenting there in cloth tents. There was a beautiful spring of which we drank - the water so pure and cold: near it was a large flat rock, with round rocks all around it, we sat there and ate our lunch, the chipmunks peeped out from their hiding places they were evidently used to sharing in the lunch, they sat up on their hind legs and ate the bits of bread we gave them. There are two streams in the park, along their banks the poplar trees are thick (and up the mt. side) the grass is two feet tall the deer come down in the winter into this sheltered place, blue bells were very thick. There are Crystal beds, and shafts have been sunk in search for gold - they must have cost hundreds of dollars, near the shafts is a little log cabin in which the miners used to live -- from one point in the park we could see C. S. and the streets in it -Oldtown and Manitou, nestled down at the foot of the mountains, and away out on the plain for miles and miles. There is a log hotel by the entrance at the gate of the park. There is a large patch of raspberries so we were told, and some go up and tent and can them.
Day before yesterday in the morning, father Sinton and I had a talk on Spiritualism. I should not have said a word if I had thought he was so much in sympathy with it. ["in sympathy with it" is written in the bottom margin, the next page is missing. In the next top margin is written, "Monday, Sept 25 I came in a few minutes ago"] ago with George from the plains: we went out after the cows. There is nothing I enjoy more than being out there, there is such a feeling of freedom. There is always a breeze and the air is so ["delightful" crossed out] bracing. These days are perfectly delightful. They are cool and breezy, and as bright as bright can be. It does not seem to me that they have quite such beautiful weather back east. George and I have an organ, we bought it sometime in June, I think. I have two new pieces of music - The Bridge - and Kathleen Marourneen. They are both beautiful.
Wednesday Sept 27th
I am growing more and more attached to Colorado. I love the vast plains and the mountains and I am glad God made them just as he did. Cheyenne Mt. is beautiful now, the low shrubbery on it is turning red and yellow, there are patches of one and of the other, and they run in together in places. There are pretty colored patches too on Mts. Garrfield [?] and Monta Rosa.
February 4th 1882 Sunday morning:
We are still living in the same little house that we started in in Colorado, we enjoy it ever so much, we have a dear little home. There is just George and I now, Melvin has lived with his father and mother since about the first of January. They live a short distance from here on Weber Street, and Will's folks are living with them this winter. Mother came to Denver two or three weeks before Thanksgiving, father was there sick, or not well. They all came up from there Thanksgiving and we had dinner at Will's, and a pleasant time.
We are alone now, but there will be a third one next summer I hope-, a dear little baby, I think it will come about July. I have got cloth to make some little wrappers and flannel for night dresses. I shall commence them this week. I am trying to be very careful about my diet, to feel as well as possible. I am feeling real well now, but last fall I was so ["Miserable" crossed out]. poorly in health. I eat only two meals a day, and try to eat but little variety at a meal. I feel better to do so, I have a little book called "Prenatal Culture" the plan of which I am trying to follow out. O, I hope to have a nice child -- well balanced -- and good and "comely to look upon." A mother's work is a great work and I hope to do mine well. I want a child who is equal to life and who is interested in all that is good, and who can live above temptation, and one who is practical.
Sunday evening Feb. 11. 1883.
We went to church this morning, this afternoon Geo. and I took a ride out on the Mesa to see a water claim. I had a nice long letter from ma, acknowledging some mittens I sent her & c (a pair of silk mittins [sic] that I knit). Pa and ma both write such good letters. In a letter to Jessie a
short time ago, I told her that I told my baby that its mamma loved it. She said you may tell it its Aunt Jessie loves it too. The dear little thing asleep in its warm nest. God bless it! And help me to be sweet and patient all the time for its dear sake. For the last week I have felt uncommonly social, I have felt so much like calling on my friends. But my hands are busy these days. I have commenced my little wrappers and they are so sweet, I have two nearly done. All of my little clothes I shall make neat and pretty but plain. I have not much sickness at my stomach now, I feel very active and I sleep pretty well generally. I am very constipated and take injections every day. I eat apples for breakfast. According to "Prenatal Culture," I am in the Third Stage of the baby's development. The Observing or Perceptive Powers and Communicative and The Retentive or Recording Faculties. I keep all the accounts of our table expenses now, and do the most of our buying; I study the location of places some. Geo. and I are reading American History and I am trying to remember some of the principal dates. I drew a little picture the other day, of some water lilies (I love to draw flowers) and I play and sing some.
Sunday evening - Feb 18,'83
A week ago to night for the first I felt my baby move, and it has been quite active all the week. I am making its flannel night dresses now.
Sunday morning Feb 25, 1882
We are going up to Monument park to day -- George and Melvin and Will and Nina & I; it is a lovely Sunday morning and I hope we will have a pleasant time. We are passing through some pretty sore trials these days about our business matters. Father and the boys cannot see things alike, I cannot tell what the result will be. I try to keep calm and patient and not be disturbed, but it makes me feel pretty badly at times. I pray God that I may be calm and trustful and rest in him, believing that all will come out right. - - - -
Sunday July 8th 1883
It was just five weeks ago to day that our little baby came and went. - our dear little baby girl -it seems now as though I cannot give it up. It came before I expected, about a month, but Dr. Holmes thought it was a nine months baby or nearly that, it was so well developed. Baby was born June 3rd Sunday morning. I was taken sick on Saturday night about half past ten. About twelve o'clock George built a fire and got me up in the big rocking chair with quilts wrapped around me. I was not sure that baby was going to come, I thought perhaps they were false pains, When they came on, I got up and walked around the room. I could not sit still*. [Asterisk refers to a note written on the left side of the page reading, " * baby was very active all night. "] -- I put the room in order, and got the baby clothes and other things necessary in the basket together. At half past four George went for mother, and when she came, she sent him directly for the doctor. The pains grew harder and longer and at twenty minutes past nine, baby was born. It came with breech presentation (doubled), we did not know it until afterwards. The cord ceased beating about five minutes before it came but Mrs. Holmes thought even then she could bring it to. Just as soon as it was born she rushed to the kitchen with it, and mother said she worked so faithfully to try to bring it to life, but all in vain, either the pressure on the cord was so great or else the afterbirth smothered it, as it came just as soon as the baby was born. They brought the baby to me in its little white dress on a pillow - it was so sweet and pretty. It was light complexioned and so fair and soft - just a little hair on the top of its head and that very light. I do not think it looked much like either of us -- tho' in complexion it was like George --very light. I never can forget the sweet little face, and its head was so nicely shaped. What a sore disappointment it was to us -- it seemed that afternoon as tho' Geo. could not be comforted. I did not hold the baby that afternoon nearly as much as I wanted to, it made Geo. feel so badly. I could not realize that afternoon that baby had really come and gone. -- not until afterwards did I realize the bitter disappointment.
But I felt all that afternoon that baby was in the bosom of Jesus, close to his heart and that it would be cared for just as tenderly as I could care for it. -- but there are times when I feel as tho' I must have it back, and I cry for my little darling to come to its mamma. But I know it is better for it to be developed in heaven than on earth, where there is so much of sorrow and where we have our evil propensities to struggle against. As it grows and develops [inserted "into womanhood"] Jesus will have a blessed work for it to do, --I have wondered if it would not be a ministering spirit to its papa and mamma --Savior may this sorrow purify us and make us better,
may it sweeten our lives and make us more helpful to others.
Little baby laid on the pillow in the rocking chair, with its little flannel blanket over it, all the time except when it was on the bed with me. In the evening they put it in a little box and Melvin put it up under the cottonwood tree on father's place, and the leaves whisper over it, and the little birds come and sing to it. I have set out portulaca plants and sowed sweet peas where it lies.
Next year I shall set out a rose bush there. Sweet little tender spirit, asleep in my Savior's bosom -- its papa and mamma will love it evermore.
Colo. Springs, Sept 27, 1883
Just a week ago to day pa and ma started home. We had a very pleasant visit while they were here, and it seemed so good to have my mother. We had several pleasant trips to the mountains.
Pa and Ma took care of me while I had the fever -- and Pa made so many convenient things for me -- a scouring board, molding board, salt box, put in two new shelves, and fixed the cellar stairs and built a coal house. What good kind parents I have. They made us a present of a black walnut kitchen table and Geo. a present of a carving knife and fork and I a bread knife.
Sunday, Nov 25. 1883.
I united with the Congregational church three weeks ago today. I had come to the conclusion that it was the thing for me to do. I feel that it will a help to the Higher Life.
We want a little baby so much and are going to try to have another this year; I am going to be very careful, and do nothing to get it out of place. I hope not to be as sick with it as I was before. O if my little baby girl could have lived, it would have been so pretty and cunning now, and such a comfort to me. Geo. wants a little girl next time, and I am going to try to have one; it
will be about the first of December that we expect to start it.
Sunday, Feb. 5, 1884.
We are building a house on the other end of this place - father has given George a lot; we think it will be very pleasant and convenient. There are to be three rooms downstairs, and one room for two chambers above: we expect to move in it by the first of May. What decided us was our getting the pasture out east for the next three years. I hope all things will move as satisfactory as we expect. I am carrying a little baby again -- I think it will live this time. I am having it so soon after having the other. I think it will come quicker and easier, and if it comes even with wrong presentation, I think it will stand a great deal better chance of living than the other. Dear little baby -- how thankful I shall be if it is placed in my arms alive.
We are attending the Methodist church part of the time now. Mr. Arendel, the minister, is so much of a thinker, his sermons are a feast. This morning his subject was "The Hidden Man of the Heart" showing what a depth of both good and evil there is in everyone and how we should struggle against the evil as it is revealed to us out of the depths of our own hearts. We need God -- we need him to trust in, and to take refuge in, in hours of darkness. I am going to trust in him and live with him more than I have.
Sunday, April 13, 1884 --
We expect to move or be moved within two weeks now. The house is plastered, and the inside work is to be done this week. We have taken a great deal of comfort in this house -- it was where we commenced housekeeping, and I hope and trust we shall take as much in that; it will certainly be very convenient. I have passed thus far safely with my little baby -- nearly four and a half months, and I think if I can pass through moving and not over do I shall be all right. I have not been nearly as sick this time as I was the other, and I have gotten almost entirely over it now. Nora has invited us at their house Tuesday evening to make her auntie a surprise, as it is her birthday. I was there one day this week and helped them a little on a rug. I am going to bake a Coconut cake and take to the surprise. I have been very busy serving and making up little conveniences for the house -- during the past weeks. I have got things pretty well done up now. I have bought a piece of lace for curtains for my bedroom -- it was a remnant, and I got it cheap. I have fixed up a lounge, and now I have my curtains to fix. I am going to get red calico for the upstairs and kitchen windows, as it looks pretty and will not have to be washed often, and that is a consideration with me, as I must study every way I can to save my time and strength; there is so much that must be done to run a home well, and as Mrs. Meserve says, there is only one pair of hands to do it. There is a saucerfull of daisies standing before me, some of them white, and some a pink white --they are so pretty --. The spring is late this year -- it is cold and damp now. -- We have had but little warm weather yet. We are reading the Life of Peter Cooper and it is so good - - he did so much good in the world, and he was a poor sickly boy to begin with. I think one may take courage. I think there is a great deal in making the very best use of one's time and strength and means. It is a thing to study continually. Today was Easter Sunday, I wanted to go to church, but was too tired when I got my work done in the morning, but I took a good rest and that was good for the dear little baby.
Sunday Morning June 1, '84
How much I have enjoyed this morning -- I have been cleaning up the house. Nina is sick and I have had to be up there considerable this week -- they are keeping house on Pikes Peak Avenue now. My rooms all look so cozy and clean and cheerful. I do feel thankful for this little home and Geo. enjoys it equally as much as I. For the past week we have been very busy gardening. We have set out a small Strawberry bed, some Asparagus, and planted Corn, Beans, Peas -- we have some up -- Beets, Vegetable Oysters, Cucumbers and Melons, but I have no faith that the latter will amount to anything. Fruit trees have been in blossom during the week, and how much I have enjoyed seeing them, they have never blossomed so full since I have been in Colorado. I had a letter from Jessie and she sent me some flowers from the woods at home, it took me back to the times we went together in the woods on Sunday afternoons. Everything is so beautifully green this morning this is a lovely world. It will be a year ago in two days that I was taken sick and lost my little baby -- I wonder who cares for it now -- dear little thing -- but I know there is some kind Angel who does. I think that little girl will love to paint flowers, when it gets older. I have been thinking this morning about the little one I am carrying, what traits I will try to develop in it as it grows to man or womanhood. During the next three months I want to put away every uncharitable and unkind thought, I want to rise above those things -- to live higher, as, I would have my child -- how much company it will be to me and with what delight will I watch its growth and development. If God sees best to let us have it, we will try to do our best by it to develop all that is God-like in it.
Aug 11th, 1884
My little baby had to be given up. I was taken sick July 2nd in the afternoon. I was not sick long -- two or three hours-, the little thing only lived two hours. First Nina died June 2nd just a year from the day that I had the other little baby; her death was very sudden, we did not know she was dangerous until the day before she died. Mother and I were both there the night she died. It was too bad to have to go and leave Will and the babies so soon. -- -- -- We all got sick here, first Margaretta was taken very violently with Pneumonia, then George took a very severe cold and was sick in bed for a week or more, did not do any thing for about two weeks. Meanwhile I had taken a very hard cold but did not have to give up to it, although the last week I ought to have gone to bed and been nursed. I believe if I had I should have saved my baby. Finally one day when Geo. was getting better we tho't we would take a little ride to Glen Eyrie, the roses were all in blossom then and I was feeling so bad, so depressed that I felt the ride would do me good, for I do love such places so; -- they soothe and rest me so. But I ought not to have gone -I think I must have taken a little more cold, we stopped at mother's to dinner, I laid down and rested awhile after dinner, then I came home and made cheese and put a churning to going -- but towards night I began to feel bad in my chest and shoulder. I doctored myself up as well as I could, and went to bed and to sleep. I did not feel well next morning -- I got up and dressed and had to lie down again soon. In the afternoon about three o'clock I began to talk of sending for the doctor, we first sent for aunt Mary -- I begun to have little pains low down, they seemed to go from my side, finally I was afraid my baby was going to come -- we sent for Doctor Holmes again. Geo. & I tho't it was going to live at first, and we felt very happy over it, but it was too
weak -- it seemed as tho' the little thing tried its best to live -- it made such sweet little noises. When I look back over it now, I do feel so sorry that I did not consult a Physician than last week before I was sick, it is what I ought to have done. I ought not to have gone to the mountains that day, but laid in bed. I do hope these experiences will help me at another time to save every particle of strength that I can. I do not know as my baby could have been saved at all, after I had passed through what I had --all the worry of so much sickness as there had been here -- but if it had not happened I think I should have carried my baby through all right, -- the full nine months. I think it is very important with me at least that I have a chance to lie down and rest when I am tired. I have suffered so much, no one knows how much -- in a great many ways. I am thinking of taking Willie for awhile at least -- my heart and courage fail me at times -- then again I feel quite courageous.
August 17, At Home.
Father, mother, Will & Melvin and the children have been here to dinner today. I think Willie will make a nice child, and at times I anticipate having him with me very much, then again it seems like a ["terrible" crossed out] great burden. It seems cruel sometimes that I had to give up my own baby that I had planned so much for and take another. There are hours now when it seems as tho' I can not give up the little baby. O if it only could have lived, so many babies do at seven months, and why could not mine have been one of them? I shall try to do the best by him that I can -- to make him a healthy happy child, and I hope I shall take comfort with him. I know a good many think it foolish to care about a baby dying at birth, but most women do not want children at all. I know I am young, only twenty-six and there is plenty of time for me to have children, but it seems to be so hard for me to carry them that it is discouraging. I wanted my baby now to sleep on my bosom and nestle close to my heart. How I wish I could see my two little babies. I wish God would bring them to me some night and just let me look at them and kiss them.
August 26th 1884
If I ever carry another child, God help me to be more patient. I have almost agonized over it that I was not more patient at that time -- I got so fretted and worried -- but baby dear is safe and will never have this life battle to go through. It is a sweet thought to me that the little sisters will grow up together. I know they will love each other, because I loved them so. Jessie does not believe in children, or she says if you do not have them, then you do not have them to lose, and leave you when they are grown. She says people who have children have more joy and more sorrow than those who never have any. Well I want to wait several years before I ever have another at any rate. Maybe I shall be a better woman by that time -- more patient and trustful and quieter and sweeter. Wherever I can make a bright spot in the lives of any one around me, I shall try to do it. Every one's life has more or less sorrow and others have helped me, so will I help others.
Although it is not September yet, we are having lovely fall days. I enjoy the mountains morning, noon and night. Miss Krauss said when she first came in sight of them, she felt they would help her to be strong and good.
April 5th 1885 - Sunday evening -
George has gone to church, and I will write in my journal. Little Willie has got so he is a real pleasure to me, he has grown into a happy healthy little fellow. - he can run all over now, and say a great many things; he says, Deorgie, for Uncle George - he is very affectionate, and he sleeps with me; I am doing up his summer sewing now.
Mother asked me last Friday to sit with her and Mrs. Bumsted at their circle that evening. I went with her, and the little messenger told me about my babies¹. She said the oldest was beginning to talk some, and that they were both beautiful little children that they had not so much in their natures to overcome, that they were harmonious, because they were children of love, that they were together. She said they came and nestled in my arms and put their arms around my neck (or she said it came probably the oldest as the other is too little) and kissed me. I asked her
¹ The circle was a gathering of people together with a medium, who would communicate with spirits of the dead. As Mary Snow Sinton mentions earlier in the diary, the Sinton family was interested in Spiritualism but she appeared to be skeptical; after the deaths of her children she starts to participate in communication with them through mediums.
what they called my babies -- she said I called them The Sisters. I was very much surprised at that, because that is what I call them to myself - the Little Sisters, and that is the only time I ever called them so to any one else except George. She said, tell my chief they were brought to him too, and that they come and play with Willie. I asked her when the babies came, and she said, when I thought of them, she said I must keep my thoughts pure and sweet, and that I ought to thank the Good Spirit more. She said Nina blessed me for taking care of Willie.
O it is a blessed thought that my babies can come to their mamma, and that their mamma can nestle them close to her heart. I loved them when they laid asleep, when I carried them close under my heart - and I love them now, with such a tender yearning.
Yesterday was Willie's birthday, he is two years old; we weighed and measured him. His weight is 22 1/2 pounds, height 2 feet 7 1/2 inches. - - he is learning to talk so fast now and is so cunning. He has a good time playing at night when I put him to bed.
Last night I sowed a large place of mignonette where the babies are. If it grows well, it will fill the whole air around with its fragrance. Today I have sown Morning Glory, Sweet Pea, Pansy and Mignonette -- I have got them in earlier than last year. I have also sowed the clover on our Lawn, and we have all the trees set out.
I have a new dress that Jessie made and sent to me, by my order -- I like it well and it fits me very nicely. I think so much of it because it is Jessie's work.
Last Monday, I voted at the school election for the first time, one of the letters said full half the voters that day were women. I cast my vote for Mrs. Cooper.
Saturday P.M. Sept 12, 1885
It is a very windy day, and it is trying to rain -- we have had so much rain this season; in fact I do not believe there have been half a dozen days in all summer but that it has rained at least a little. Will was married a week ago to-night to Miss Lulu Bell, she is young, I believe hardly
twenty; she is quite fine looking and seems good and sensible. She has a good deal of ingenuity at fixing clothes. She is intelligent and nice appearing, and I think Will has done well. We felt badly to have Will marry so soon after Nina's death, but I think for him perhaps it is best; there is such a difference in people. I have wondered if it did not grieve Nina -- no one knows. I have
[one page missing] ... management of Margaretta; she controls her so well. I know it is a great deal harder to bring up other people's children than it is one, one would feel so much more freedom. O if I am ever so fortunate as to have a child of my own that can stay with me -- won't I appreciate it! God only knows how much I will.
Hattie Bumsted and I have been having a pleasant time doing some landscape painting this summer, we are now painting a picture of Twin Lakes. Father Sinton started east last Monday and I expect mother will go in a little over a week. I wish I could see my father, mother and Jessie, but that will not be this year -- perhaps next year, but do not know -- there are so many things to hinder.
Colo. Springs, Sunday July 4th 1886
Yes, I do appreciate my dear little baby girl (not named yet). [She refers to a note written on the inner margin of the diary "she weighed seven pounds when she was born."] She came on the third day of May; and now is getting to look very bright and pretty, she laughs a good deal, she looks like George and his family. I do enjoy her very much, she is so sweet. Today I went to church and left her with George; she slept all the time, and until three o'clock this afternoon, when she woke up she felt so happy. O I think it is so nice that I have her; she is such a dear little companion for me, and will be more & more so as she grows older. She has a fight complexion, dark gray eyes and dark hair.
I had to keep very quiet the last three months that I carried her.
Father and Mother went east in Sept. and are still there, they may come back this fall, but I cannot tell, they seem to enjoy it there, and I think father's health is better than it was here.
Geo and Melvin sold the Dairy sometime in the last of February and they have taken the management of the Broadmoor. I think it was a mistake, their selling, but I [page missing] Caroline Center Oct. 24, 1886
Baby and I are here at grandpa's house -- we arrived here about the first of September. We are having such a nice time, and I shall always feel thankful for this visit. Little Jessie is so good. She is a little blessing, and her grandpa and grandma and Aunt Jessie all love her. -- she is so sweet and playful now. I could hardly get up courage to come home, it seemed like so much of an undertaking, but George encouraged me so much and we had an opportunity to sell our home, which we had concluded it was best to do, so every thing seemed to shape in a way for me to come. I packed up my household treasures and we moved them over to the "little house" and I took baby and started in company with Aunt Mary Bartlett. I have spent over two weeks with Jessie, and the rest of the time I have been here with Pa and Ma. I had a lovely ride from Ithaca the day I came from father Sinton's, Pa came after me with the democrat wagon, it was a beautiful afternoon, there was a nice breeze, and little Jessie slept all the way. I enjoyed every inch of the road, it all seemed so natural -- the hills looked so pretty. When we got home Ma and Jessie came out to the horse block [check?] to meet us, and I put baby in Jessie's arms. I was so glad to see them I could not speak at first. Baby stayed with her Aunt Jessie two or three hours that evening, as contented as could be.
Wednesday -- Oct 27
It has rained steadily all day, so we could not go to Aunt Eunice's. I have been doing up a good many little things that needed doing. This afternoon I baked some cookies for ma, and cut out a white dress for baby from part of checked muslin that ma wore when she was a young woman. --it has been in the house ever since I can remember. While I was baking the cookies and doing the cutting in the kitchen and dining room, grand ma and baby were in the sitting room having a nice visit. Baby sat in the big rocking chair in front of grandma while she was mending her calico wrapper. A few days ago I made ma a lot of ginger cookies so they will have cookies enough to last them quite a while after I go away.
Thursday, -- Oct 28
This morning baby awoke just as it began getting a little light, and she cooed and talked about an
hour. When pa got up to build the fires he came in to look at her and she laughed as she always
does. Pa and ma do enjoy her ever so much. When I dressed her she took hold of her big toe, and tried to get it in her mouth. We have buckwheat pancakes for breakfast every morning, and either pa or I bake them. Pa helps a great deal about the housework, washes dishes, sets table, sweeps etc. and does the work just as nice as a woman. It is still raining and I see from my bedroom window there is quite a good deal of water in the little brook below the house. This morning I looked in the book case, and there on the top shelf were the same books that used to be when I was a child --- Bunyan's Pilgrim's Progress, Baxter's Saints Rest, Abbot's Young Christian, Irving's Chamber's Encyclopedia --that has been added since I went away, the Gazeteer of the State of N. Y. and Webster's Dictionary.
Tuesday Nov 2.
This morning I ironed -- Frank came down and stayed two or three hours -- he is not well now and has to be very careful he is not able to work at present. Jessie spent the day with ma and baby and I; where then she went home I went up through the woods with her -- the ground is covered with a bed of leaves; it seemed nice to see the moss and plants that I used to. Elva Freeman called here this afternoon, she rode one of their pretty white ponies, and had on a pretty green riding habit with velvet on her hat to match. This morning the fog lay down the valley along the stream just as I used to see it on summer mornings -- I never tire of that view; the distant hills look so soft and pretty.
Colo. Springs Jan 6, 1887
Since I have come back, we have got moved and settled -- we are living in the south part of town on Nevada Avenue; it is a pleasant part of the town, we are nearer to the business part than we were before. Another Christmas has passed, and little Jessie had her first Christmas present, it was a rubber rattle. I put her in her carriage in the morning before she was dressed and let her pull her rattle out of her stocking and she did coo over it so sweet. She would look at her rattle, then look at us and coo and laugh. She is such a little treasure, her Aunt Jessie said for me to kiss her ten times for her, and I did -- I gave her five kisses on each cheek.
Just now little Jessie is very much interested in watching me wink my eyes, when she is in my lap, she puts her hands up to feel of them where she is in my lap, and she takes hold of my nose. We gave father and mother a picture of Miss Willard framed for Christmas, and Melvin a pair of blankets. I sent some views of Colo. to Aunt Jane. Geo. received Ramona and I a very pretty little sugar bowl and cream kitchen [?] and fruit plate, mother gave me a sheet of music. Melvin gave little Jessie a five dollar gold piece and her papa has given her his note for it at four percent. We are going to keep it on interest for her until she is grown to womanhood.
Saturday evening Jan 29, '87
Baby is asleep and Geo is staying at the Ranch nights now, so I am all alone. I miss him so much evenings. To night the wind is blowing hard, it gives one almost a frightening feeling to hear it raging so outside but God is with us, he is my dear father and I am trying to live as He would have me live. He knoweth the secret thoughts of our hearts and to be as He would have us be implies a great deal; but he is a kind and merciful father and full of love; he knows our trials and temptations. Mr. Gregg said if our hearts were full of his love there would be no room for any wrong feelings there.
Geo. and I have been reading Ramona -- it is indeed a sorrowful tale of the wrongs the California Indians have rec'd at the hands of the whites. What a world of sorrow and wrong and suffering this is- there must indeed be a very bright world coming.
I am reading Dr Channing's works now and I find so much that is good, his thoughts are so strengthening. Last evening I was reading his sermon on Christian Worship -- a part of it and as one proof of immortality, he says "How ardently does the human parent desire to prolong the life of his child! And how much more must He who gave being to the spirit with its unbounded faculties, desire its endless being!" That to me is a grand thought and a great proof.
Feb 2nd 1887 Wed. Evening.
I have just put my little lamb to bed and got her to sleep. Today she slept out of doors in her carriage, and the wind rocked her to sleep. It was a warm soft wind. This afternoon she got herself half way across the floor, I cannot tell how she did it, she did not creep. She does so many little cunning things: one day she was sitting in her carriage and she pulled off her little bootie and dropped it on the floor, then she took up her little bells and leaned over the side of the carriage and shook them at it. I have been making her some new night dresses as her first ones had got
uncomfortably small for her. I shall soon have to put colored clothes on her as she is getting to soil light ones so much, and I want her to play on the floor and have her liberty. I am starting or about to start a cook book, and I think I will copy some in it this evening.
Feb. 12, 1887
Saturday Evening -- I am alone as usual, as Geo. is staying at the Ranch nights. A letter from Jessie came to day in which she sent a pattern of some crocheted lace edging which she designed herself --It was for Mrs. Bumsted as she had sent for it and I took it up there this afternoon. I have been making baby a sunbonnet of blue -- I have forgotten the kind of goods; it is real pretty it is like one that Margie's mamma made for her. Jessie weighed nineteen pounds when she was nine months old. There was a dog here that stayed a day and a night --which was got for the Ranch for a shepherd dog. Baby got attached to him; he would wag his tail then she would kick. Jessie was sitting on the floor and the dog by the side of her and finally he got up and walked into the bedroom as dogs are wont to do -- to see all that is to be seen and Jessie turned around and looked.
Every night about half past five o'clock I play with her as she gets tired and fretful and that quiets her.
Sunday Feb. 20,1887.
They are going to build a cottage at the lower Ranch, which we are going into as soon as it is completed. I think it will be quite pleasant to live out there. I have made three new gingham aprons for my self this week.
New Broadmoor, May 6th 1887
We moved here the first of April, and like it well; we are near Cheyenne Mt. my favorite of all the mountains. There are birds, and a large ditch of water running below the house, which I enjoy so much. Baby was a year old Tuesday -- Margaretta and Arthur, who had been making a visit here, went home that day. Jessie creeps all over the house and goes very fast; she pulls herself up on her feet and we think she will walk soon. She weighs 21 1/2 pounds. May 22. Sunday P.M.
We go to town with George twice a week and Jessie enjoys her rides just as much as we do. --we go to see Lulu and Margie and Willie and Bell frequently, also Mrs. Bumsted and Aunt Mary. Mrs. Bumsted thinks so much of Jessie -- she came to see me so often the last three months that I carried her, when I could not go out at all -- I shall always think a great deal of her. Jessie made over my silk dress during the past winter and when it came -- sewed up in the pocket was a necklace for baby -- her little namesake it is something she will always keep.
Sometimes I feel it so much -- how much I miss in being so far away from Jessie; there was always such sympathy between us and I often feel that if I could but have her, just once in a while to talk to it would be such a comfort: but we cannot have every thing we want, and I do feel truly thankful for little Jessie. Every thing is getting beautifully green now, the low bushes on the hills are leaved out and the cottonwoods east of the house. I enjoy the natural prairie grass around the house as much as I would a lawn, there are quite a good many wild flowers. What a grand mountain Cheyenne is. Two weeks ago to day Geo. and Jessie and I drove away up among the foothills. We found lots of anemones -- Geo. went or tried to find a spring, we finally found the little stream that came from it and Jessie sat on a bed of kinnikinnick by it. It has been a nice quiet Sunday to day; I do not like to have people come in on Sunday that I do not particularly like- but I like a dear friend that I feel very much in sympathy with. Jessie is saying "ma ma" and pulling at my dress.
Yesterday when we were in town we bought her some alphabet blocks. We stopped at Mr. Gilmore's a few minutes to see Mollie Hammond last night. I am going to have her come down here and stay a week with me if possible sometime this summer -- she is over here from England all alone -- poor girl -- there are so many wicked men ready to take advantage of such girls. [new page]
New Broadmoor, Friday June 3,1887
Geo. commenced to day to go to Manitou with butter so I have been alone all day; but I have had plenty to keep me busy so I have not got lonely. I washed and this afternoon I have swept the bedroom. Last week Friday and Saturday I was sick and work had to go undone. Jessie has always been so good whenever I have had a sick day. It was one week ago to night that I
commenced to wean her and I have given her nothing but milk from her cup since I have got along so much better than I expected, the first night she cried very hard about 3/4 an hour for me to nurse her, I have always got her to sleep in that way, we were in bed together just the same as always and I comforted her as best I could and she finally got to sleep. She woke up once in the night and cried and I gave her a drink of water; and she has not cried in the night since.
Now every night before she settles down she lays her little soft cheek on mine and then lays her head on my breast, for the last two nights she has gone to sleep on my arm, what a blessed baby she is! I wish her Aunt Jessie could see her.
To day I have longed for Jessie -- I can talk to her about anything and feel a perfect trust in her; she was always my strength and one whom I advised with and there have been times since I have been here in Colorado that if I could have had her to talk with in place of any one else, it would have saved me a great deal of suffering. I needed some one who loved me to open my heart to. I never shall forget the anguish of mind I felt when I lost my second baby. I told Nora a good deal and I was so sorry afterward that I did; if I had had Jessie it would have been all right; what I said to her would never have been lisped and farther [??] and she would have had the fullest sympathy for me. I feel sometimes that I can never let Jessie (little) go so far away as I went from my mother and sister. Mrs. Bumsted has been a dear friend to me -- almost like a sister, she has been that just as far as she could. What an interest she took in me before I had Jessie. I shall always love her, whatever may be her faults -- and I think she has fewer of those than those who criticize her.
To one thing I have made up my mind and that is not to criticize or not to speak of the faults of those who are dear to me, even in a charitable kindly way, of those we truly love, we feel like covering their faults. I wish God could talk to us audibly and advise with us and rebuke us when we need it.
"New Broadmoor" Aug 10th
Almost two months since I have written in this. Baby has not been well ever since the real hot weather came, she has had summer complaint and lost so much flesh -- it has been a very anxious summer with me so far. I have to be very careful with her now, or it brings it back again. I think we have had an unusually hot summer and there has been a great deal of sickness with
children. Willie and Margie are staying here this week and are having a fine time running all over. Margie fell into the ditch the first morning she was here. I sent pictures of baby home a few days ago, she sat for them before she was sick, but we did not get them finished up until several weeks after; we think they are very good of her this time. My dear little lamb, I do hope she will begin to gain ere long, I love her so dearly.
Sunday we were in the bedroom and Jessie reached up on the bureau and got my little hand mirror and looked in it and said "see at, see at" and seemed to think that the other little baby was so nice, then she put her little cheek to it in a caressing way. If I can only raise the child how thankful I shall be.
We are having a very warm summer, it is so hot to day that it takes away all ones ambition and strength. I am not well at present, I wish I knew "what ailed" me I have not been well for two months and at times have been in a good deal of pain. This morning I baked some salt rising bread and had good luck with it -- it is real fight and tender and it was all done by noon. Yesterday I recovered the rocking chair -- my little sewing chair; and I want to partially recover the big comfortable in my bed which ma and Jessie and I made before I was married -- it is a good deal worn now. I thought I would do some thing at it today, but I do not believe it is best, I am feeling so poorly. I think I will make baby some bibs.
In my last letter from home Pa says that Ma is knitting on Jessie's spread, the fourth and last one -- she has knit one for each one of us children. Sometimes I feel afraid she has overdone in doing it, and it certainly is a very nice piece of work to give each one of the children. I expect mine will last me as long as I live, and it will last Jessie her lifetime. I do not know whether it will be handed down to another generation, but it will undoubtedly, it is so strong -- that is, if there is another generation to hand it to. I am going to have two new books. "Day unto Day," and a book of prayers and selections, published by the Unitarian publishing company. Baby is feeling much better than she did Sunday, she is so much company, she talks and plays.
We feel so unsettled as to whether we are going to stay here or not. They wanted to rent the ranch to us, but we could not accept. These men who own this business have no judgment and they use money like water. "New Broadmoor" Aug 23, '87
I see I have never written about baby Elinor coming into Will's family. She was born July 4th. She had dark hair and eyes like her papa and Willie and was a pretty baby. In a very few weeks Lulu had to wean her as her milk gave out and for awhile cow's milk seemed to agree with her well, as she was filling out and getting rounder and prettier every day; but cholera infantum set in and I think it was not much over a week before she was dead. The weather was very hot and she was rather a frail baby, so mother thought. She died Friday Aug 19th and was buried Sat. the 20. She did look so sweet as she lay in the little casket, her little form all but the sweet little baby face, covered, with flowers which some of their friends had sent. I went to the greenhouse and got a vine of similar and a small calla lily, some daisies and other small white flowers, and as I had not time to help arrange them, I went over and asked Mrs. Crawford to go early and arrange them, which she kindly did. When the casket was closed the smilax was placed on the top and went entirely around it.
Lulu carried the casket on her lap to the cemetery, so mother said who was in the carriage with them -- she wanted to do it.
Lulu said the baby looked like Jessie -- and I think perhaps she did-- their hair and eyes were certainly alike. Mr. Gregg read some beautiful selections from the Bible at the funeral -that from the gospels where Christ placing a little child in their midst said, except ye become as a little child ye shall in no wise enter the kingdom of Heaven. -- that always seemed very beautiful to us, but that day as that sweet little baby lay in its casket and Jessie sat in lap it seemed clothed with a new meaning and a new beauty.
New Broadmoor Oct. l6th
It is quite cold to day and the tops of the mountains have been covered with clouds, we have expected show, but none has come as yet. Jessie is so much better now.
The roses have come back to her cheek, she is gaining in flesh and strength and is much more playful than she was. I am thankful to have gotten her through her second summer and do hope she will not have another such. I do not think she will, for she has been cutting teeth all through this. We bought our business back the first of Sept, and have bought a place of our own
and have built a farm for forty head of cattle and have a house well under way. We are going to have a very pleasant convenient home with plenty of room. Below we have a family bedroom, plenty large with two closets off from it, just nice for Geo. and I, and two babies' (perhaps) sitting room, parlor kitchen and pantry. Up stairs are three bedrooms with closets off from each. Our place is on the hill east of town, we have a fine view of the town and Mts., the house faces west. Baby and I ride over there often with Geo. to see how things are progressing at the house etc. I am so glad we will be settled in a home of our own when Jessie comes to see us, next fall I hope. There is no doubt now but that there is another dear little baby coming, it will be here by the first of March. (I felt movements the first of October) I am very glad of it now, if I can only be careful not to overdo. -- It will be so nice for Jessie to have a little brother or sister to grow up with her; but of course it is uncertain about its living, my babies are so apt not to. I have Anna Jacobson helping me, she does well for one of her age. I cannot be on my feet long at a time, but I do considerable sewing, and by and by will do knitting and embroider a flannel blanket for the little baby coming.
We shall undoubtedly move in three weeks or a month at the farthest and I want to get my machine sewing done before that time and can easily I think. I have some flannel dresses cut out for baby and shall make them this week. I am feeling much better now than I did a month ago. About three weeks ago, I felt so poorly (as tho' I should lose the baby) that Geo. insisted on my going to Dr. Benbow who is a metaphysician and having him give me treatment. I did so and have been gaining ever since, I feel stronger and a great deal more comfortable. When I asked him if he thought he could help me he said, "All things are possible with God." Why should not good people be able to heal the sick at the present day, Christ and his disciples did. I hope it will prove to be true.
Jan 15th 1888.
We moved about the first of December into our home here near town, it is a lovely place, we have a beautiful view of the town and mountains, and our house is very convenient and pleasant. Jessie has got so she runs all over the house and out of doors now. I have knit mittens, and leggings for her this winter and now I am knitting stockings.
Saturday Evening, Feb 25---- 1888 ----
We have a dear little baby boy, born Feb 10th -- at five o'clock in the morning.
He weighed 6 3/4 pounds, his hair is brown, but not as dark as Jessie's was when she was a tiny baby -- his eyes are about the same color hers were -- a dark gray, and will undoubtedly, like hers, change to a dark brown, he has a pretty little round head which Jessie strokes very softly as he lies on my lap, and kisses too. We are so glad this one was a little boy, and I do feel that God has greatly blessed us in giving us these two dear little children. Jessie is so full of fun and play now, and she was so good while I had to lie in bed....
April 29, 1888.
I have felt pretty tired lately, it is a good deal of work to manage the family and take care of the children -- but the dear little children -- how I love them. Sometimes Jessie takes her doll in her arms and ["tries" crossed out] hugs it up to her as tho' she wanted to nurse it, like I do the baby. Last night Herbert cried and Josie walked the floor with him; Jessie followed around after her with her doll in her arms; she is so sweet.
I do not mean to overwork in bringing up my children, I want to be their companions.
Sun. Morning July 29, 1888.
Herbert is getting so cunning now, he sits in his carriage and looks at his fingers, moves them and talks to them; he kicks and laughs -- he is a dear sweet baby; he seems a good deal stronger than Jessie did at his age.
I have commenced to take Babyhood a magazine for mothers -- it is devoted to the interests and welfare of babies and little children. I enjoy it so much. I look forward to its coming every month. The letters from parents are so good and interesting.
I had a letter from Jessie a few days ago in which she says she is doing quite a good deal at painting -- she is taking a magazine that has an instruction in regard to it, and says she is making as much progress as she did under the last teacher she had, and she expects to take up Watercolor painting too. I am so glad she is keeping it up as it gives one so much pleasure and every one who loves pictures enjoys them. She sent me a lovely picture of the hills and valley south east of our house, it is very natural and I think lots of it, it was a view that I always enjoyed so much; I think she did so well with it. When she comes out here I want her to make a large picture of Cheyenne Mt.
August 5, 1888.
"Pinny" is what Jessie calls her dog his name is Prince, I do not know whether I have ever mentioned him before or not, he is her playmate and they are very much attached to each other.
Thursday Aug 23, 1888
It is a beautiful day, Lizzie went to Green Mountain Falls with her Sabbath school, they had a Picnic there to day; so the children and I have kept house. They have been good, so good that I wrote a letter to mother and Margaretta besides doing my work. This afternoon Jessie perched herself up on the top of the sewing machine and talked away her kind of talk. Herbert laughed at her. Yesterday Jessie tried to make Prince say "bye - bye" to her when she went out of the room where he was. This afternoon Jessie took her cart and Prince and I with the baby in the carriage went out on the hill. I sat down and nursed Herbert and looked at the mountains. Jessie played around with "Pinny".
Sunday P.M Sept. 2nd, 1888
This afternoon papa went to sleep in the parlor on the rug, Jessie was in there with him and she carried all the pretty stones and laid around his head and put some in his hands; there are none of us who enjoy those stones more than she. Sometimes at her play when she is talking to herself she says "papa mamma, Dessie, baby" over and over again -- I have bought her a little set of metal dishes which she enjoys a good deal.
Jessie is not as well as I could wish but I think with care she will grow into good health and strength.
Herbert has the promise of being a stronger child than she....
A letter came from Big Horn Camp last night. George says he is feeling well. He arrived there Sunday morning June 2nd. He says there are beautiful cotton wood trees along the Big Horn river, they camped under some, one which he measured was twelve feet in circumference. He says, "we had wild duck for dinner. They had some trout before we came: they were caught in Norwood creek about 40 miles from here. Have learned to eat bacon etc."
Saturday Evening Oct 12
I went this afternoon to hear Julia Ward Howe at the College Chapel, on the subject "Is Polite Society Polite" -- it was a fine lecture but she did not make out polite society to be polite; She is about seventy years of age I should think, and is a fine looking woman; she wears a little white head-dress.
George took care of the children and cut Herbert's hair while I was gone he said they were good. We have cut Jessie's hair, it was so long and so thick it was a task to take care of it and it hurt her when I brushed it; so we concluded it was best for her to wear it short until she is old enough to take care of it herself and then she can wear it just as she wants to. We felt badly to cut off her baby curls, but she looks well with her hair short, I think just as well as she did with it long.
Last Sunday was an especially pleasant day to me; I united with the South Congregational church. I enjoy the society very much; there is so much friendliness and warmth of feeling among the members. Our pastor, Rev. Mr. Ormes is from the Yale Divinity school.
April 14, '90
Jessie and Herbert are over to Arthur's, they have a room up stairs for a play room and they all go up there. Jessie and Arthur enjoy playing together so much little Herbert does as they tell him to most of the time, once in a while he asserts himself and does as he wants to do. Herbert is so fat and round now, he says "mamma boy". Bertha went home about three weeks ago. Bertha and her mamma, [?? page missing??] uncle Melvin bought Jessie a little ring to give to Bertha before she went away. Mrs. Studley had engraved in it "Jessie to Bertha" After Bertha was gone Jessie went up there two or three times to see if she was not there-, she thought so much of "Bercy." She says She has gone to see her gamma in York state.
We have lately had two delightful days in the mountains, one day at Green Mt. Falls. Ellen, Mrs.
Mitchell, Margaretta Arthur and the baby; Jessie and Herbert and papa and mamma. We went on the D. & R. G. up through the lovely Ute Pass. We ate our dinner in a grove on the hill above the depot. Then Mrs. M., Geo and I, Jessie, Herbert and Arthur climbed up the mountains to see the beautiful falls, the higher up we got the more beautiful they were and the larger the rocks; but we did not get nearly to the top, tho' we saw as many as six or eight of them. Arthur and Jessie did so well climbing and little Herbert too. They enjoyed the day as well as any of us. Then we spent all day at Cheyenne Canyon. Geo and Will climbed to H. H. grave.
Nov. 9, Sunday P.M.
We have been having a little winter, but the snow is melting off and the mountains look hazy and warm. We had beautiful weather all through October and shall undoubtedly have much more of it. A week ago yesterday I had a telegram from home that ma was very sick and not expected to live. I could not go as I expect a little baby in a few weeks -- by the first of next month. I sent a telegram back immediately that it was impossible for me to go, but would write -- I had not written to Jessie about it because I did not wish to give her any needless anxiety in regard to me. I have received two letters from pa since then; she is still very low. Pa writes that her mind is perfectly at rest and she is even triumphant about dying. Dear mother she has done so much for us all -- it is hard she has to be so sick. If it had not been for the coming of this baby, I should have taken the children and gone as soon as I could after receiving the telegram.
I have been so busy getting the children ready for winter and preparing for the coming baby. We have a little bed for Herbert which can be used as a trundle. He thinks it is pretty nice, but he has not slept in it yet. I have a new book -- Miss Willard's "Glimpses of Fifty Years" -- it is very interesting. Feb 17, 1891
We have another dear little baby boy -- he came on the 17th of December 1890. -- He is now eight weeks old and weighs twelve pounds. He weighed 7 3/4 pounds the first time he was weighed. He has the same colored eyes that Jessie and Herbert had when he was their age, a dark blue gray, which turns into a dark brown. His downy hair is dark as Jessie's. He is wonderfully sweet and does not cry scarcely at all. He laughs a good deal now and notices things some. Jessie and Herbert love him very much. Jessie rocks him and sings to him some of the little songs she has learned at Kindergarten. Every one who has seen this baby says he looks just like Herbert. Christmas brought us so much this year, this darling baby boy and George made me a present of a gold watch; other members of the family helped on it some, it is a little beauty. There was a Christmas tree at Will's and Miss Dewey had one at the Kindergarten at which the mammas were invited. The presents were pretty little things the children made. Jessie made a Christmas card for each of her cousins (with help from mamma) which went on the tree at Wills. Willie, Margie and Bell also made some nice things for their cousins.
Home July 11th 1891.
Almost midsummer again; and baby is almost seven months old. We have named him Ernest Albert -- because we liked the names. We thought very strongly of calling him Joseph for his Grandpa. Pa and ma wrote that they thought it would be very nice for us to; we would have liked very much to have named him for his grandpa -- but we hardly felt like giving him that name.
We had a splendid visit with Cousin Jennie; I invited her to dinner quite often and we did enjoy it so much, and she ran in often. After she went away it seemed lonely without her.
George and I went to Pikes Peak on the new cog wheel R.R. the 12th of August. There was quite a party of us; Aunt Mary Bartlett, cousin Jenette, Father, cousin Jennie, George and I. We had a very delightful time. The scenery all along the road was grand and the road its self a wonder.
We saw Lake Moraine and the Twin Lakes. As we approached the summit it was much colder, the vegetation was different and it seemed almost as tho' we were in another land. When the car stopped we got out and climbed up on the mountain side for flowers. There were quantities of beautiful little yellow flowers that were so fragrant and looked like the Buttercups we had back in New York. In fact nearly all the flowers we found were fragrant. There were beautiful deep blue bell shaped flowers and on the summit in between the crevices of the rocks on the South slope, we found the For-get-me-not in several shades of blue. The Peak is covered with rocks probably an area of one hundred acres. On the north side is the abyss of desolation; George rolled boulders down it and it made a great roaring.
The view from the Peak is magnificent; we had a fine view of South Park and the snowy range on the west. The day was a little hazy or we could have seen the smokes from Denver and Pueblo. Colorado Springs looked very small below us; and away to the east was the vast sea of plains. About noon a thunder storm gathered below us; it was a grand sight. We were all short of breath and at times felt faint while we were there.
Wednesday morning April 13 [?]
I have not written since last Sept. -- it has been a busy winter. I read the Life of Louisa Alcott which I enjoyed so much. The children have kept pretty well, Jessie and Herbert have been to kindergarten all winter until Jessie had the chicken pox and had to stay home; now Herbert and Ernest have it. I have to think up things to keep Herbert busy; he says mamma "what can I do".
This morning he has sewed a pear. Last week Jessie brought home a little kittie from Irene's -- the little thing mewed and mewed for its mamma, and Jessie decided to take it back. She said Irene told her she could have two after awhile when they were larger. Jessie is learning to knit and
Herbert gets a stick and whittles it like Willie does -- he feels very big. Ernest is so sweet just as good and happy as ever -- he has three teeth only and is nearly sixteen months old. The children all had a great time Christmas, as we had our dinner together at grandpa's -- from Aunt Jessie they each had a pretty little book "The Lord is my Shepherd *" [asterisk refers to note written along the left side margin vertically "for Herbert."] "Editha's Burglar" for Jessie -- a very sweet story. Fred gave Jessie a ["baby" crossed out] doll carriage and Herbert a fine engine and horses.
These are windy days. -- I have done some house cleaning -- my sewing is done up better than I have had it for a year. I go to mothers' meeting quite often and enjoy them so much. They are conducted at present by Miss Dewey and she makes them so interesting.
Thursday July 8, 1892.
Just two weeks ago tomorrow morning Little Edith [Mary Sinton's niece] died. She went suddenly she was not sick long, membranous croup was what carried her off. It is hard for them all; she was a very sweet little girl and very much loved by every one. [quotes poem here] God is all love. God is all good, and all things will be right and someday we shall see them so. About two hours before Edith went, a little baby boy was born to Melvin and Marion. He is a lovely little baby. They have named him George Taylor for Marion's father. I do not know that I had written about Margaretta's little baby about six weeks old. M. has named her Annie for Frank's sister. She looks very much like Arthur. I hope she will be as sweet a child as Edith.
About a month ago George, Jessie and Herbert and I went to Denver, we went to look at some lots that Sinton Bros. own in North Denver. We had a fine time looking around the City. We went to Berkley Lake -- and Manhattan Gardens to see the Animals. We all enjoyed it very much. North Denver is a beautiful part of the city; there are so many trees. The vicinity where our lots are is called Highland Park. [page missing?]
Little Edith died the 24th of June 1892.
Jessie and Herbert felt so badly, they cried until bedtime after the funeral. I tried to explain to them as best I could how her little spirit had gone to a lovely place, where there were lots of other little children and beautiful flowers.
Oh that God will give me wisdom in the guidance of my children, and the spirit of love in my heart at all times.
Oh that I could live near "the Father at all times, then I should live rightly and wrong tho'ts and feelings would have no place in my heart. I do want my children to grow up to be good and love the good.
Home Oct 11, 1892
We had the first fire in our sitting room to day that we have had since last Spring it is quite cold and windy. We expect father and mother Sinton home now in two or three days, they have been east on a visit -- to Buffalo, Dunkirk, and vicinity to see Aunt Maria father's sister, and Aunt Fannie, mother's sister. Margaretta, Frank and Arthur will probably stay longer, they went to Boston, started about the same time father and mother did. Their little Annie died about two months after Edith did, she was a little frail baby and it was probably best so -- tho' hard for them to lose the two so near together.
Jessie is going to school now, she started about three weeks ago to go to the Siller in the Primary department; she is rather young -- six years old to go to school, at least it seems so, but they decided ["to" crossed out] not to have children over five in the Kindergarten any longer -- I talked with Mrs. Dr Cooper about it and she wanted me to try letting her go to school, so I went with her the first morning and stayed an hour and a half. I was very much surprised at the improvement that has been made in teaching children to read -- it is made so easy and attractive -not at all as it was when I was a little girl and went to school; their the exercises are so varied the children can hardly get tired. Slates, pencils and books are all furnished, and that is such a saving of expenses for the parents. Jessie seems to like it well, tho' at first I think she was homesick for the Kindergarten and for Miss Dewey. Miss Dewey is such a large warm hearted woman, I do not wonder they all love her; but the Kindergarten moved so far away I could not let Herbert go any longer. The Primary department in the school is so nice he will probably go there in a year. He is very much interested in making kites now-a-days. I put pants and waists on him about the first of August; he was very proud of them -- he went to show grandma, Mrs. Taylor and Mrs. Burt his pants.
Last Friday was the 400th Anniversary of the Discovery of America and by a Proclamation of the President it was celebrated by the schools throughout the land. The children and I and Mrs. Taylor with us went to the Siller school. The exercises consisted of recitations ["and singing" inserted] by the children, raising of the flag over the school building, and address by Rev. Mr. Warner and a Flag Drill which was very pretty.
Nov 2, 1892.
Last Saturday Margaretta and I went to Denver to attend the National W.C.T.U. Convention. We started in the morning and arrived in time to hear the President's annual address.
Trinity church was crowded to the uttermost, and an overflow meeting was held in Unity church addressed by Lady Henry Somerset and others. Miss Willard's address was grand. She is very light complexioned and looked rather pale -- owing I suppose to the loss of her mother and the voyage home from her trip to England. She has a very intellectual face and is distinguished both in looks and appearance.
Saturday Evening were addresses of welcome by Gov. Routt, [?] the mayor and others. A response was given by Lady Henry Somerset, President of the British W.C.T.U. She came from England with Miss Willard to attend this Convention. She is a wonderful woman * [asterisk refers to a note written vertically in the left margin "has great powers"] -- so persuasive as a speaker, her voice was so sweet and yet she was distinctly heard all over that vast audience room. She has a beautiful face, so full of love and sympathy for humanity -- and is [inserted "beautiful in manner"].
Then there was a presentation to Miss Willard of a beautiful quilt, with blocks in it from ["England" crossed out, inserted "all over the world"], one from India and a piece of Pres. Hayes' necktie; some very happy remarks were made -- One lady from Pueblo said she put in three solid weeks on it. An oil painting was also given -- a picture of Pikes Peak and the mountains near, painted on silk.
The church was beautifully decorated with flags and banners. One motto was "No Sex in Citizenship".
A ["One" crossed out] fraternal delegate from Canada said they would have Woman's Franchise and Prohibition in Canada before they had it in the U.S. There were 380 Officers and Delegates in attendance. 52 States, 5 Territories and District of Columbia were represented.
Here are some things which Mrs. Sweet said in her Christian Science lectures at mother's which I
think are very beautiful.
"Do not talk of the faults of others, they do the best they can."
"Do not talk of the faults of children, as it does not help them to overcome their faults." See the good and speak of the good in every one rather than the evil; if we think hard thoughts of others we throw stones at them.
Do not find fault with yourself, you are a part of God.
Keep God's love burning in our hearts, this most of all.
August 6, 1893
Mother ["Sinton" inserted] died Sunday afternoon May 28th so suddenly, of hemorrhage of the lungs and still it was no more than we had all felt might happen; she was only sick about an hour. It was hard to give her up, she was much to us all and to the grandchildren -- she thought so much of them and had such a good influence over them. . . . Mother talked and thought a great deal about a future Life and I have heard her say she tho't there were those who would make preparation for our entrances into the future state the same as our coming into this.
[On the way back to Colorado from a visit to Mary Snow's family in the east, the family stops at the World's Fair in Chicago]
We started from home on Monday Evening Sept 4th on the R. Island through to Chicago without stop or change in two nights and a day. We took a room at 6039 Washington Ave. within a block of the Fair Grounds, so we could walk and not have to get on the Street Car with the children. We went into all the principal buildings -- the U.S. Government building -- in which was an immense whirling world -- a representation of the Greeley Expedition -- which was so real, it almost made me feel cold. There were the immense icebergs, the little hut in which Lieutenant Greeley and his party lived. Lieutenant Greeley and the Esquimos, the long narrow sled to which the dogs were fastened and upon which they rode.
There was an exhibit of the officers in the Army Department all mounted on their horses. The North American Indians, the stuffed Animals and Birds from the Smithsonian Institute were fine and the Oil paintings of the Presidents and Distinguished. The California big tree too was fine.
At Home, Colo. Springs Dec 2.
Jessie came over home just as I had gotten that far in writing about the Worlds Fair, so of course
I stopped writing to visit with her ......... The Manufacturers and Liberal Arts building was immense, covering over thirty acres; and there one could see just the very finest and best of everything that is manufactured from all over the world. It was a building of great interest,
Jessie and I spent one afternoon together in the Art Gallery (sister Jessie). Among the striking pictures that we saw in the ["American" crossed out] United States department was "The Mutiny of the Sailors," a very large picture of Columbus and his crew and the Landing of Columbus,
They were both very large fine pictures. There were some very large fine pictures of women, taken from life I suppose. "The Artists Wife" was a beautiful picture. The Statuary to me I think was more fascinating than the pictures there were some pieces that were so beautiful. "Joan of Arc" to me was one of the most striking. It represented her sitting rapt in a vision. Then there was a little baby fallen asleep on a pillow that was so sweet and Proliction, a very large dog with a child asleep at his feet these were a few that I admired very much. One afternoon George suggested that we take a Steam Launch and go to the Art Gallery as we were a long way from it, and it would be so far to walk; it was a beautiful afternoon and the ride was lovely The lagoons were so pretty....
There was a display of the finest of work of women from all over the world in the women's building. One morning, instead of going to the Fair grounds, we went to Chicago and to the Women's Temple at the comer of Monroe and La Salle Sts. We took the elevator and went to the top which is twelve stories high. It is a beautiful building, I wish I could describe it. If I had only written about it soon after we were there I could have told much more than I can now. The floors were of marble. And the mid-day prayer meeting was being held in Willard Hall. The ladies' parlor was in the highest story where we went. The crowd in Wabash Ave. and the principal streets was great. We intended to take the steamer on Lake Michigan back to the Fair grounds, but we got so tired we did not but went back to our room, took a rest and in the evening went out to the Electrical display. The Fountains and the Electricity building were beautiful.
We arrived home Oct. 30th on Monday. Uncle Cortez met us at the depot. It was a beautiful day, but I felt lonely for quite awhile without ma and Jessie; but I am thankful those feelings wear away after awhile. Jessie has been very sick, but is up and around now, and gaining all the while. She had fever for about nine days. Dr. Holmes came to see her every day for about a week…
Sat. Evening -- 1321 Date St.
San Diego, Calif. Aug. 4th 1894.
The rest have gone to bed and are all asleep but as we expect to start for Los Angeles Tuesday I want to write some tonight as there will be no other time. We came to Calif. six weeks ago on account of Jessie's condition of health; she has improved ever since she has been here. We started from home June 16th, taking a Tourists' sleeper which we found just as comfortable as the Pullman, the train was not crowded and the children could lie down and sleep whenever they were tired. The trip through New Mexico, Arizona and Southern California was very interesting. The Mexican villages with their adobe houses were unlike anything we had ever seen, the houses were quite tidy and neat looking. Several times Indians came to the train to sell their pottery, once they had milk.
… Yesterday we all went down into Mission valley to see the Old Mission which was established in 1769, and the present Indian school. As it is vacation there are only about thirty Indian children there, but usually there are about a hundred. The school is in charge of the Sisters and one of them showed us around some. The children are taught to do all kinds of work besides their studies. H.H. [Helen Hunt] has not over drawn the picture in regard to the Calif. Indians. The Sister told us of an Indian woman who lived up the valley, had her little place with vines, etc., supported herself and her family; the settlers came in, her place was included in the land they took up, they told her to get off or they would burn her house down, she was helpless, so she took her little girls (one of them a baby three years old) to the Sisters at the Indian [school?] and asked them to take care of them; she went to Temecula the Indian village and died broken hearted. She said what few Indians there were left were utterly penniless as the whites had taken their land from them. At the time the Fathers were there at the Mission there were 2800 Indians in Mission valley.
The Government is helping them by allotting to each family 20 acres of barren land; land on which there is no water and no human being can live. The walls of the Old Mission are made of adobe bricks, plastered on the outside and are about four feet thick. Below the Mission (which is on a hill) are Olive orchards over a hundred years old and very tall Palms which are about the same age. In this valley are a good many reservoirs and windmills.
Pasadena Oct 21, 1894.
We came back to Pasadena the middle of August, George was going home and I knew I should
feel so much better contented to be here somewhere near Margaretta. When we came we took rooms in the Wooster Building of Mrs. Sunderlain and we have found in her a dear friend. She is a strong C. Scientist and has been giving Jessie treatment. Her faith seems to lift her above the ills of life; she lives in the Spirit. We are now living on Mary St. and Margaretta lives next door; it is very pleasant for us. Herbert and Arthur go to school and Jessie goes with them often, and they all go to S. School. I went to day to hear Miss Kollock and heard a beautiful sermon on Prof.
Pasadena Jan 18, 1895.
It is a rainy morning. In last night's paper it said over twelve inches of rain had fallen. It is a
great thing for the country if it is not so pleasant. When it does not rain it is very pleasant and the children can play out-of-doors and have such a good time.
Christmas passed pleasantly, there was a["n" crossed out] Christmas tree at the church for the children, the day before; on Christmas eve they hung up their stocking and got their little presents which they enjoyed very much.
We all had dinner together at our house -- father, Frank, Mar. -Arthur and the baby.
For presents Jessie got a little New Testament and Psalms, [inserted "from papa and mama"] Checkers from Helen Keyes and a little Japanese dresser from Herbert. Herbert got Dominoes, a little boat from Jessie. Ernest got a little horn, and harness for playing horse -- they all got pretty little picture books from Arthur. Last year Jessie and I made little perfumery bags and Jessie worked some doylies and we sent some to grandma and Aunt Jessie, Aunt Lottie and Anna and Sabra -- put them on the Christmas tree at uncle Melvin's for each of the Aunties -- Aunt Marcia was with us. This year we could not do much for Christmas.
George got Mr. Foster and his sister to stay at our house this winter while we were away. Mark F. is working for us.
Pasadena Feb 4, 1895
Yesterday P.M. Papa and Jessie, Herbert Ernest and I took a drive across the Aroya and to the hills beyond; every thing is looking lovely since the rains and the air is clear and beautiful. We drove four or five miles from here towards Los Angeles; we saw some old Mexican Ranches. The hills are covered with grain which they grow for (barley) hay. We saw one lovely little village where they grow fruit, most every house had several acres of fruit around it, and in several places we saw where tomatoes had been grown quite extensively, George said they were taken to the Los Angeles market. He came back through Gararanza [?]on the Los Angeles road and through South Pasadena.
431 S. El Paso St.-
Colo. Springs Jan. 11, 1898.
We returned home from Calif. in 1896 about the first of August. We were so glad to be in our own dear home again, and Jessie has kept so well. Every thing seemed and looked as natural as tho' we had only stepped out the day before -- our place had been well taken care of and the trees were much larger than when we went away. It seemed so nice to see Pikes Peak and the mountains again from our front door. I do not think it would be possible for me to be any happier than I was the first few months to be at home again. Our place looked prettier than any place I had seen in all the long two years I had been gone. There are very few homes that are as finely situated as ours. We had a Christmas tree at our house the Christmas after our return home. All the Cousins and Uncles and Aunts were here; we had a fine time. This year we had no family
Christmas tree for all the family -- only a small one that was given to Herbert at school and he brought home. The children trimmed it with popcorn and paper chains and had their presents on it. Jessie had "Longfellows Poems" and a muff. Herbert Young Peoples History of America and a mouth organ and Ernest a book about Birds and a top. We spent Christmas day at WHI's and had a very delightful time; there were twenty-eight in all there.
Oct 23rd 1899.
It is a long time since I have written in this book -- about twenty months. A good deal has happened since then. Father Sinton came home from Calif. a year ago last May; he stayed with us most of the time he was here. The children enjoy having their grandpa here very much.
About a year ago we bought a new piano, and we have enjoyed it very much. Jessie has taken lessons ever since we got it of Miss Dwinell [?]. She is a fine teacher and Jessie has done well. Miss Dwinell told Aunt Lulu that Jessie had progressed the fastest of any child she had ever had. I did feel quite pleased over that. She is getting so she plays some very nice things. Herbert and Ernest are going to the Lowell school -- Prof. Collins is the Principal and it is a splendid school. They get along very fast in their studies. We had a nice visit from Mrs. Clapp this fall just before father went away. She is a very good woman; we discussed Christian Science a good deal.
We both think they say a good many absurd things, but there is a truth at the bottom of it. She told me to say, God is with you, if any one was sick in the family and I felt very anxious about them.... Mr. Fish's father who used to know her at Ithaca came up and spent a day while she was her. We had a splendid visit. He knew William Lloyd Garrison, Horace Greeley, Wendell
Phillips and other prominent men of those times and told reminiscences of them. He says he communes with friends both seen and unseen and he looks as tho' he lived in Heaven.
Home, Dec 18th 1899.
Our beloved Jessie passed away on Friday evening Nov 17th at nine o'clock, after an illness of five days. She had not been well all summer; she had La Grippe in the spring and did not seem to get back to where she was before. I kept hoping by being careful she would regain her strength but she did not. About the first of August she was very poorly, her feet and ankles were badly swollen, I did not know what physician to take her to, nor what was best to do for her. I was
feeling very poorly myself as I had hay-fever about six weeks and had had so much watering to do on account of the dry season I was very tired. About that time Ella Bowers came here, she was suffering from a lame knee; I told her we would do the work together and each have a rest. She insisted on my having Jessie take Electric treatment of Dr Arnold. So I went down and talked with him about it. He said he thought he could do Jessie a great deal of good, as he had helped similar cases. So she commenced her treatment and in three treatments the swelling had almost entirely disappeared he gave her a thorough examination, he said she was very anemic and her heart's action was weak, but he felt in a few months he could have her in a great deal better condition. When she came off that electric machine her cheeks would be as red and her hands as warm -- it was so good for the circulation. One day when I was down with her the room was darkened by the curtains being down, she had on her white dress and as the electric brush was used there was a beautiful light shone all through her dress and in her hair around her comb. Jessie improved a good deal with the treatments, her color grew better and she got stronger. While Ella was here, she went with Jessie to take the treatments most of the time, Ella enjoyed going. After they would get through at the doctor's office, they would go up and see Dr. Holmes frequently, or take the car and go down in Ivywild to see Mrs. Hale. Dr Arnold is such a kind sympathetic man, and was so fatherly to Jessie. A woman who does nursing said he was "such a dear man", I thought that just expressed it, While Ella was here she and Stella and I went down one afternoon with Jessie and had her photograph taken. We all had such a pleasant afternoon together. Every one calls it a beautiful picture, Stella calls it a "soul picture," Aunt Jessie says "I look at her photograph so often, there is something fascinating in the purity and sweetness of her expression, but there is also a far away look in her eyes that makes me feel sad." She said Rob said when he first saw that picture, he felt that she would not live long. Aunt Jessie says "her face has the look of one who belongs more to the other world than to this, I have always felt so when I have looked at it."
Sunday Evening --
Her immediate sickness and death was caused by a cold. [large space] She was in Sunday School the day before she was taken sick. She did not feel very well that Sunday morning she ate a little breakfast. After breakfast she said she felt chilly, so I had her take some hot water as she always did when she did not feel well, she sat down by the kitchen stove and warmed her feet in the oven, after a little she said she felt better and she wanted to go to Sunday School. I felt as tho' she was hardly able, but her papa said let her go with the other children and when she got up there if she was not able to stay she could come home from church with us. But I went to her after the sermon and she said she said she felt well enough to stay. George and I came home from church and I had dinner all ready by the time the children got home from S. S. It was a beautiful warm day and I had promised her during the week if it was pleasant Sunday we would all go to Manitou Sunday afternoon. So after dinner she and I did up the dishes together, I washed and she wiped them, and we all went to the Soda Spring and drank soda water, we had a gallon jug and the children and I filled that with Soda water. Jessie was so fond of it. Coming home after sundown Jessie laid down in my lap and I covered her all up warm with the afghan. I do not think the ride hurt her a particle. Jessie ate no supper that night, but took her hot water and went to bed early. Monday morning she did not get up. I made some gruel and she ate some. Miss Dwinell came about ten o'clock as usual to give her her music lesson, she had her lesson all learned but was unable to take another. The kitty laid by Jessie a good deal all day Monday, the kitty loved Jessie and Jessie loved the kitty. Jessie would say, "kitty was a darling soul," she always attended to feeding it and was very particular to have it have a clean dish every morning. Monday afternoon Jessie wanted me to lie down by her awhile and I did so until she went to sleep. Tuesday morning she wanted me to get the couch out of the parlor so she could come out in the sitting room and not have to lie in bed in the bedroom, so I did. The sun came in so nice and warm in the south windows and it was so pleasant here in the sitting room. We had Dr. Arnold come up and see her in the forenoon Tuesday -- it was Dr. Clarence Arnold -- his father was back east on a visit. As he came in he said, in his pleasant way, well Jessie you could not come to see me, so I have come to see you. There did not seem to be any thing very serious the matter with Jessie only that she had a cold and one side of her face was swollen some -- he told me to use hot compression on it. -- He said he thought it would not be necessary for him to come the next day, but to telephone for him to come if she did not get along well. -- He left remedies. Wednesday afternoon George was down town and word had been left at our milk depot that Frank and Julia Clark Grant were in town, George telephoned to Mark at the barn that he was going to bring them right up here and to let me know. I had time to get a fire started in the parlor and get the room warmed up before they got here. We had a very pleasant call from them. After they went away Jessie came out and laid on awhile before she went to bed for the night. While they were here George suggested that we get Stella to stay with Jessie the next afternoon (Thursday) and that he and I go to the Garden of the Gods and Manitou with them as they were going away Saturday. So we had Dr Arnold come up and see Jessie Thursday a little before noon and he said it would be all right for me to go away awhile. So I put a plaster on her back and one on the side of her face that was swollen and got her all fixed comfortable. She laid on the couch in the sitting room, Stella came over and brought her sewing to sit by Jessie and give her her medicine. We started at two o'clock. We had a nice drive and a very pleasant visit. Frank took some pictures of the scenery in the Garden of the Gods. -- in one of which is Julia, George and myself on the rocks. We also drove into Glen Eyrie and enjoyed that very much, and we drove to Manitou. When we got home Jessie was just getting over a bad nose bleed and I was sorry I had gone. Aunt Marion was here with Stella and they had done just as well as I possibly could if I had been here, we telephoned for Dr. Arnold, I was afraid it would come on again in the night; he left remedies in case it should and told me what to do. Papa helped Jessie into the bedroom and then she wanted me to lie down by her -- after she had had some soda water to drink; I laid down by her, put my arm around her and took hold of her dear little hand. She did not feel well enough that night to say her sweet little prayer as she did the night before when she kissed me; but she went to sleep soon. She was rather restless the first part of the night and wanted a drink often; the latter part of the night she and I both slept quite a good deal. Myrtle has since told me that she was in to see Jessie* [asterisk refers to note on outer margin "Myrtle said Jessie told her she was better --and would soon be well again."] that afternoon while we were gone to Manitou and Aunt Marion played for Jessie some. -- I was so glad she did, and Jessie dropped off to sleep. Jessie lost all appetite -- Thursday morning she ate a little oyster soup and that was the last of anything she ever ate. Dr Arnold wanted me to have her take milk in the Soda water when she drank it, but she did not like it that way. Friday morning I saw she was very much weaker than she was the day before and twice as I laid her down on her pillow she said "O mamma I feel so good. " Well dear, I said, I am so glad. I felt then that some change had taken place in her. Before I had time to finish my dinner Jessie grew worse and her papa and I did not leave her bedside that afternoon. We changed her position often and gave her water every little while which she said "tasted so good" she said "thank you" for every drop of water we gave her and was so grateful for every little thing done for her. Dear little Hazel Honeyman brought her in some pansies about four o'clock, her mamma told me afterwards that she asked Hazel to go out and pick them, it was so late for pansies (Nov 17) and so unusual to have them that time of the year, and Hazel wanted to bring them right down to Jessie -- she could not see them as both her eyes were swollen shut, but I told her about them and she took the dish and smelled of them, she was very much pleased with them and she thought so much of Hazel. Winnie came in on her way to school that afternoon to inquire how Jessie was and George sent word by her to Will's folks that Jessie was very sick. Lulu came up about four o'clock -- they had not heard she was sick. She stayed with us that night -- it was a great comfort to have her. About five o'clock Jessie wanted me to lie down by her, I got over on the back side of the bed by her and laid my head by hers on the same pillow, her breathing was then so hard and difficult. She said to me "O mamma can't you help me?" I said Jessie dear what can I do, she said, "rub my stomach" and I did so for quite a little while, it seemed to do her some good. Bell sent up some pink and dark red carnations about seven o'clock, we told Jessie about them she took one in her hand to smell of and held it almost until the last. I saved the carnations and the pansies which Hazel brought and have them put away in a box -- they are dried. About eight o'clock Herbert and Ernest came in the bedroom, took hold of her dear little hand and kissed it, she said "good night" to them and they went to bed. After they were in their room up stairs they cried so hard, Herbert especially felt so badly, he seemed to realize it, more than Ernest. She passed away at nine o'clock, Lulu and I sponged her off, put on her clean flannels, her brown flannel skirt, her white skirt trimmed with lace. It was freshly done up and Jessie had not worn it since Ella did it up in the fall when she was here. Her white dress and waist had to be done up and Geo. took them up to Mrs. McGaugh the next morning. George telegraphed to Aunt Jessie and Aunt Margaretta that Jessie had died, within an hour after her death. Willie was here and he took the telegrams to the Telegraph office. He also telephoned to Frank and Julia at the Alta Vista and they came up here soon after. He also telephoned to the Undertaker and after he came she was laid in the parlor. While Jessie was sick one day and laid on the couch here in the sitting room, Herbert and I wrote a short letter to Grandpa Sinton. I told him Jessie was sick and that she sent her love to him. Monday afternoon the first day she was sick I wrote some to Grandpa Snow* [asterisk refers to note on the inner margin "She sent her love to her grandpa and (sym.) grandma and Aunt Jessie."]. I had my letter nearly finished but not quite and got up early Saturday morning and wrote them about her death just a little which had occurred the night before and sent it by the Postman at seven o'clock. Lulu George and I went down town to make arrangements for the Service which was to be held the next day, after Mr. Fish had called and the next day, after Mr. Fish had called and we had set the hour at three o'clock. We went to the green house and ordered flowers. Smilax, cream white roses, a dozen to lay around her in the casket, and pink and white carnations. Lulu wanted a palm for the occasion which she said meant Conqueror. In the afternoon we had a good many callers, but we got the house pretty well straightened up for the next day. Frank and Julia came at four to stay with us all night; it was so nice to have them here as it diverted our minds somewhat from our sorrow. George and they visited a good deal that evening, Julia sewed a black suche [?] in my black waist. She also sewed the light blue ribbon bows on the shoulders of Jessie's white dress which Mrs. McGaugh had done up. But I was so tired and worn out I went to sleep in my chair. The next morning at the breakfast table we sat and visited quite awhile and enjoyed it so much. After breakfast George took Frank out to the barn to see the cattle. Julia cleaned up the sitting room and she knew at a glance just the prettiest way for the parlor to be arranged*. [asterisk refers to "she is so bright and quick to think."] She set the little oak table across the corner behind the casket and a stand at the head of the casket which was placed across the corner where the couch usually stands. The Undertaker (Capt. Baker) came and he and Julia put on her white waist and dress. Julia and I braided her hair and I tied on her light blue ribbons which she always wore with that dress and which matched the ribbons on her shoulders. She was dressed just as she was when she went to S. School in the summer and she looked just lovely. The swelling had gone down from the side of her face and she looked much more natural than the night of her death. Clara came and arranged the flowers, there were so many sent. There were flowers from the Unitarian S. S. Pink roses, violets and carnations and smilax, a little bouquet from the S. S. class, there were flowers from the Employees, a beautiful anchor of white flowers and smilax from her girl associates here on the hill, there was a large bouquet of white chrysanthemums tied with white ribbon from Mr. and Mrs. Keplinger, George and Myrtle -- Ellston brought flowers, Percy a sweet little bouquet which was laid in the casket with Jessie, Hazel Honeyman a bouquet. Frank and Julia a handsome large bouquet of white chrysanthemums and ferns that stood in the stand at the head of the Casket. The Palm which Lulu furnished stood on fancy table back of the casket.
Smilax was festooned from the lace curtain above and was fastened to the Palm. Clara pinned the pink roses all around the head of the Casket (which was covered with white brocaded velvet. Our cream white roses were laid around Jessie and pink and white carnations were in bouquets on the table with the Palm. That corner was a place of beauty. At our request her six girl friends here on the hill of her age acted as Pall bearers and wore their white dresses and the girls told me they each wore a pink and white carnation they also brought a pink and white carnation to be pinned on Jessie which Clara did. Clara arranged the flowers; she is very artistic in floral decoration. The girls who acted as Pall Bearers were Ella Parks, Winnie Merrick, Myrtle Ellston, Pearl Sellmeyer, Bertha Oaks and Emma Goshen. Miss Dwinell called Saturday afternoon and I asked her to take charge of the music, She brought a gentleman friend, Fr Wells, who sang two solos. Mr. Fish conducted the service; he was in the sitting room. Our family and our relatives sat in the bedroom. The Service was opened by Mr. Wells singing Auld Lang Syne to the new words "It singeth low in every heart." That thought in the last verse is so good.
"They cannot be where God is not, On any sea or shore. "
Then Mr. Fish read some beautiful selections from the Psalms. The 23rd Psalm "The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want" and the 27th Psalm "The Lord is my light and my salvation"; "the Lord is the strength of my life." I dreaded the service, but as he read the pain left me. There were other selections from the Psalms, and then he read that beautiful poem by Longfellow "Resignation."
"There is no flock, however watched and tended,
But one dead lamb is there!
There is no fireside, howso'er defended,
But has one vacant chair!
There is no Death! What seems so is transition.
This life of mortal breath
Is but the suburb of the life elysian,
Whose portal we call death.
She is not dead - the child of our affection
But gone unto that school
Where she no longer needs our poor protection
And Christ himself doth rule.
Day after day we think what she is doing
In those bright realms of air-,
Year after year, her tender steps pursuing
Behold her grown more fair.
Not as a child shall we again behold her-,
For when with raptures wild
In our embraces we again enfold her
She will not be a child.
But a fair maiden in her Father's mansion,
Clothed with celestial grace;
And beautiful with all the soul's expansion
Shall we behold her face.
This is not all of the poem but some of the verses -- I always loved the poem, it is doubly dear to me now. We read some other selections and then made a prayer. There Mr. Wells * [asterisk refers to note written vertically along the inner margin "Mr. Wells had a fine voice"] sang that beautiful hymn by Phebe Cary "One sweetly solemn thought Comes to me o'er and o'er I'm nearer my home to day Than I have been before. When we arrived at the Cemetery, the grave and the earth around the grave was lined and covered with evergreen, it was just beautiful and made such a lovely background for the flowers. Mr. Powell the sexton had it done. The girls each dropped their carnations in the grave on the casket.
Jessie is laid on the lot with her grandma Sinton. Frank and Julia went to the Cemetery with us but when we got back Julia was here and opened the front door for us. George took them down to the Alta Vista that night and they picked up their things and went to Denver. Jessie slept with me since the first of August; how many times have I put my arm around her in the night and taken hold of her dear little hand and prayed "O Father bless in love thy child." I felt that he knew best. I believe she is blest and my prayer is answered. Aunt Jessie wrote me that she was in a beautiful place and I fully believe it. I sent some flowers -- some of the pink and white carnations, asparagus fern and smilax in a box to Aunt Jessie; she wrote she pressed and should always keep them. I also sent some of the pink and white carnations to the mother of my wash-woman, an old colored lady. I took some over to Marion, as she had a little baby boy (came the same night of Jessie's death) and sent some to Cousin Eva who was the mother of a little baby girl.
I sent a little bouquet each to Mrs. Bowers and Mrs. Burt, also of the pink and white carnations; there were so many of those and they were so lovely. The day of the service was a beautiful warm day (Nov 19) on Sunday at three o'clock P.M. Every one was at liberty and it was largely attended. Several spoke of it how beautiful the service was. Stella Castle said it was the most beautiful service she ever attended. It was as I would have it, restful comforting. Uplifting. Mrs. Fish who was Jessie's S. S. teacher told me that a service was held for Jessie at the S. S. the day of the service here, Jessie was in the S. S. just the week before. She was very much interested, in the S. S.; their lessons were in the life of Christ and they all had little books in which each Sunday they wrote down the main points of the lesson and on the opposite page pasted in a picture illustration of the lesson; she had not missed a Sunday since the S.S. opened in the fall and she wanted to have all the lessons in her little book. Bell is going to finish out the little book and I shall always keep it. -- -- -- -- I am so thankful for all Jessie has been able to enjoy. After our return with her from Calif. she was in school most of the time for two years, she could ride her bicycle several miles at a time and not feel it at all, a year ago last winter she went skating with Myrtle and Winnie a great deal, last winter they went some, but not as much as the winter before we had so much cold weather and it was so severe -- the coldest winter for many years. So she had been able to do nearly every thing that her associates could do. A year ago last Oct. (I think it was) 1898, we bought a new piano and Jessie took lessons until the time of her death; she did so well in her music. Last winter she took a half lesson once a week, she was going to school and stood it well. Miss Dwinell said she practiced so carefully. Jessie and I both enjoyed the piano so much. I enjoyed her music and took so much interest in her progress and helped her sometimes. This fall the piano was such a comfort to her as she was not able to go to school. Her music lessons made up for it in part. She took part in a S. S. entertainment about two weeks before her death, sometimes her papa would take her up to the rehearsals and sometimes she would walk over and go up on the car. She enjoyed it -- Bell and Myrtle and Winnie were also in it. We have had the most beautiful fall and winter I ever knew. Jessie was out a great deal. She rode with her papa and could enjoy so much. I think we have very much to be thankful for considering she had such serous organic trouble. She has had a happy little life not withstanding her sickness.
January 12th 1900 [written in top margin]
That evening before Jessie died Stella came over from Melvin's to see how Jessie was. She was then very low, almost gone. She went back home and went up stairs to her room hurriedly. There she was her own mother, grandma Sinton and Jessie. She said Jessie looked perfectly beautiful, she said she was so glad to be out of that sick body and if papa and mamma only knew how good she felt they would not feel so badly. Stella came down stairs and told Carrie Jessie had passed away. Carrie said she knew it as Melvin had just come in and said so. Stella has since told me that she has always been that way. She sees her father and mother frequently, she has spiritual vision. -she is one of the few who have it. A week ago last Wednesday evening (Jan 3, 1900) Carrie, Stella and I sat at my little sewing table in the sitting room and Jessie and mother wrote us some lovely letters. This is what dear Jessie wrote -- Dear Mamma I am real happy. I asked her if she had seen Mrs. Laurie's baby, she said I have her baby sometimes", I asked her if she saw Edith, this was her reply. Edith and I are together a great deal. I told her of little things I did Christmas --I sent Aunt Jessie a Christmas card and handkerchief of hers, and sent grandpa Sinton a pretty watch, each of the children paid a little on it, I took a little money out of Jessie's pocket book, so it was from her too. She said I am glad you did". [new page] "Yes I was here Christmas. I have seen Jesus. He is so good and kind, he loves you all. Tell papa I do not want to go back to the earthly life again. I am waiting for you all to come to our new home, it is so beautiful. I help take care of the babies. I love them so and we are all so happy". I told her she could go and see Aunt Jessie now. She said "yes I have seen her and it was such a surprise". I asked her if she heard me
when I played on the piano. She said, "I am so glad when you play. I wish you would play more and I wish Herbert would take lessons." I asked her if she saw Aunt Maria, "Yes Aunt Maria comes to our side often, you can't imagine any thing about it; we are all so busy and we never get tired. Grandma wants to come herself. O how much more I love you all."
There was this besides I asked her if she kept on with her music. In reply she said ' "O mamma I play so much; it is all music and flowers and singing. I am with you a great deal." -- This is what mother wrote -- Dear Mary - How my heart has ached for you. I know your grief Will be but for a moment; we
will all soon be gathered together again - ----------
To George she wrote in regard to Melvin "He will have much trouble but will come out all right.
He must keep up good courage. His Court-house will be finished. I am with you and help you all that I can and believe me I take an interest in all of your work for your fellow men. How our love grows for you all. My blessing to father and all of the family, and the Heavenly Father gives his blessing also,
Your loving mother -
Our Family Record.
George Herbert Sinton was born at Gowanda, Erie County N.Y. May 24, 1858.
Mary Arethusa Snow was born at Caroline Center Tompkins County -N.Y. Dec. 10, 1857.
George H. Sinton and Mary A. Snow were married on Thursday Dec. 30, 1880 at Caroline Center, Tompkins Co., N.Y. Our Family Record. [new page]
A little baby girl was born June 3, 1883
-- did not live
A little baby girl was born July 2, --1884 -- died the same day.
Jessie Sinton born Monday May 3, --1886
Herbert George Sinton born Friday Feb 10, -- 1888.
Ernest Albert Sinton -- born Wednesday December 17, 1890
Jessie Sinton died Nov. 17th 1899.
Feb. 16, 1900 [top margin]
There are some more letters written later from Grandma and Jessie which I will also copy, They were written about the first of February; these are from Jessie. Dear Mama - I am so glad you believe I come, it is so much easier for me to come to you. -- I asked her if she was with her sisters? "Yes, my sisters are with me, we have such a beautiful home". I asked her who it was she first saw the night when she died, "Grandma and mama Castle and there were lots of others." I asked her if the musical instruments there were like the piano. "No they are so different here, but I cannot tell you now." I asked her if she had a teacher in music, she said "The Great Master is our teacher, he is so gentle and O mama it is so easy to understand when he gives us his thoughts, when he plays it is so beautiful. We have our own homes. There are so many birds, they sing so perfectly here, Oh you don't know how good it feels to be so well and fine". I asked do you see Christ often? "Yes I see him often, if I just whisper his name he comes to me." I asked, do you have pretty places like the Canyons here? "There are lots of pretty places, so many banks of soft grass and flowers and trees and little silvery streams of water. We play out on the banks with the babies. Dear mama tell Mrs. Laurie I see her baby often, it crows and laughs and is so sweet. I told her I was going to give each one of the girls her photo, she said "Yes I know, I am glad; I put that thought in your mind. I am with the girls sometimes." Jessie, I said, do you hear us when we sing. "Yes I am with you and sing too, but I cannot make you hear." I told her I saved a lock of her hair. She said, "my hair is so beautiful now." "You don't know how we enjoy coming to you. Grandma is here; we came in a large company. Tell Herbert and Ernest I often go with them to school. My love to all. How I love to have you give me a chance to talk with you in this way. Good-night -- Jessie Sinton. Herbert and Ernest wanted me to ask Jessie some questions for them. Ernest wanted to know if she had wings. She said "we do not have wings but we can go rapidly, without any particular motion. The Angels have wings, but we are the Redeemed of the Lord and are different." Herbert wanted to know if they ate anything "We do eat fruit sometimes, but we do not need to; we eat from enjoyment." Herbert wanted to know if she petted the kitty any. "Yes Herbert I like to pet kitty now." He wanted to know if she could help him to be a better boy. I can help him and if he remembers I am with him much it will help him to remember." I asked if her sisters were nice "O mama I am so happy with my sisters; they are so lovely." I asked if floating in the air was as nice as riding a bicycle. She said, "it is so much nicer you cannot imagine how good it is to be so free and move so quickly and easily." I told her I had a little pin with her photo, in it. "Yes I know I like the little photograph". "I often hear you speak my name and come to you," she said. "O Mama I do surely come, do not doubt it, for it will make it harder for me to come. Tell Pearl I have shown her some glimpses of my new home. I wish you would sing more, I enjoy it so much, we are so much nearer in spirit then." I told her I had found "The Bird's Christmas Carol" a little book of hers that we had not been able to find for a long time. I told her it made Herbert and Ernest and I think some of her. She said, "I remember, that was a sweet story. It is so nice to think I never shall have another pain." I asked her if she practiced considerable, she said "Yes I practice every day. I am glad you told Mrs. Saurie I take her baby to her. I would like to have Stella with you. I hope you can see me. O papa how I have enjoyed this evening, being so near you." Jessie, I said, I have three boys this winter to care for and manage, I wish you would help me. "Yes, she said, I will help you all I can, we can help you more from this side than from the other, because we understand better." Jessie, I said, help the boys to get along together. She said "Yes mama I will help them I have been staying with mama Castle for a week-, she has such a lovely flower garden. I have been so happy with her; I am glad Stella is going to college. I saw Mrs. Williams when she came, I like her." Papa asked her if she had been to New Zealand. She said, "Grandma and I have been to New Zealand and lots of places. It is such lots of fun going over the oceans, how I enjoy it. I see Grandpa Sinton often. I like to go and see Aunt Jessie.
Love to all -- there are so many waiting -- Jessie Sinton.
From Mother -- She first wrote some to Melvin or in regard to him which I will not copy. Then she said, "Tell George I have had a good visit with Henry George. He said tell you that he takes a special interest in your work of furthering his cause; he still thinks it is the first great step in all reform work. My daughter if you could only see Jessie now, she is, so well, you cannot realize much about it, to be forever freed from the effects of disease". I asked if they were here at the Service. She said "yes Mary, we were here at the service and at the cemetery; we saw everything. There is much I would like to say but cannot now. Our love to all, Elizabeth is here. (Stella's mother) -- Prudence Sinton
Here is something she wrote later -- My dear children, it gives me so much pleasure to meet you, George asked her if they could read our thoughts, she said "Yes George, we can put ourselves into a condition to read your thoughts, we talk here without words: I asked her where they were, where their house was, she said "Mary I cannot tell you now so you would understand". I asked her if that world was a counterpart of this as she used to think, "Yes it is true but not exactly as I used to believe," then she wrote some to Melvin. Then she wrote "there are so many things I would like to say to you but Stella cannot see them now; but be true, be noble in all of your actions I know you will -- with love to all
Edith always comes with grandma and Jessie -- one night I said to her, "Edith can you smile some to Auntie? You must be quite a big girl now. -- This is what she wrote.
Dear Auntie -- Yes they say I can smile very nicely. Tell mama I am with her some and with
Arthur and my little sister. Tell papa I love to stand on his wheel and ride but he does not know it, and Grandpa I climb up on his knee when Margaret is on the other. I love you all, I am with
grandma and the rest of the children. I was so glad when Jessie came home -- Good-night-- Edith Otis. Here is something from Aunt Maria -
Dear George and Mary -- It gives me much pleasure to meet you in this way; yes we have a large family here now. We enjoy Jessie so much. She is still in the school. -- Maria Candee. From Grandpa Snow -
Dear Mary - how I enjoy being with you; we are really here. I see things differently now. How much we enjoy having Jessie. We try to comfort you for losing her -- but she is only just out of sight. Yes George, I remember the old times, we like to think of our other life and remember as it helps us to help the folks still there. I am glad of your interest in reform work. Henry George is here and gives his blessing.
George then received a very good communication from Henry George. "Grandpa Snow" was signed after his communication.
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